Yoda

It's official. Anita is off the Anita project, and has been replaced by "yoda." From the sound of the recent postings, it appears as if "yoda" is going to govern with even more of an iron-fist:

"Did you know that after Anita left they replaced her with a tyrant? I got called at home and was barked at for showing up 15 minutes late to work. We were all pushed to the center of the room and the oversight is now suffocating."

"The associate now running The Anita Project could take a few pointers from Anita. Despite what was said about her on the blog, at least she was fair."

"Did you know Tom that we aren't allowed to send text messages anymore on the Anita project?"

After the buckets of money they made off their temps with their 100 percent markups, you would think they would be a little more accommodating to those who stuck with them throughout the duration of their project.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

"I work with several dozen contract attorneys in a comparable market. At the outset I adopted an overall approach based on trust in the group's professionalism. Thus we decided not to block internet usage, monitor comings and goings, etc., and generally eschewed big brotherish oversight. We try to be as transparent as possible, particularly regarding the length of the project so that the temps may line up other work. We haven't been particularly lavish with things like meals and transportation (other firms certainly offer more than we do in these areas). We do look at production for a number of reasons, including evaluating work effort and understanding of the project.

We have let go a handful of people who couldn't do the work, but only after retraining and an opportunity to demonstrate competence.

Do you know what we discovered?Individually and as a group their performance exceeded expectations by every conceivable measure. Moreover, many will be offered full time postions because of their attitude and ability. I am convinced that the project was successful in part because of, rather than in spite of, a positive work environment."

Sept. 2006: American Lawyer Cover Story

"But if temp attorneys jump ship for other, better-paying or for longer-term jobs, they risk being blacklisted. "There are agencies and firms that have a database for attendance, for loyalty,"

-- legal staffing recruitment executive.


Joseph McCarthy would be so proud.

http://www.law.com/jsp/tal/PubArticleTAL.jsp?hubtype=Inside&id=1156943792694

From the "Anita Project" Trenches: "Ernie" and "Colonel Supertemp"

"Update does not run a tight ship; it is more like the Titanic. On Anita's project, Update's onsite monitor, Ernie, sits in his office all day doing crosswords trying to avoid any interaction with the temp attorneys. God forbid you ask him to adjust the air conditioning; he will bark at you like a dog. He sets it at one temperature regardless of whether it is 60 or 95 degrees outside. With over 100 people using a cramped toilet, Update used to provide toilet seat covers, but they stopped doing that. Ernie got offended because somebody damaged the cover holder, so no more seat covers for the temps. Ernie is the laziest good for nothing person on the project and that is saying a lot given the number of slackers here. He does not want to be bothered period. When he has to address the group, he does so with such derision and contempt. He and the rest of Update should realize and appreciate that without temp attorneys billing all these hours, there would be no Update.

How about the female Stepford Update staffers stopping giving preferential treatment and the cushiest well paying assignments to certain male temps who flatter them? How about they stop making wankers like "Supertemp" project leaders? How about Update contributing a few bucks to a health plan and a 401 (k) plan? A little quid pro quo might rehabilitate your image."

--"Anita Project" Worker

Dating The Help

Is Exposing A Fellow Co-Worker's Relationship With The Boss A Legitimate Labor Issue?
	Yes, It is Fair Game, Creates An Obvious Conflict Of Interest
	No, Everyone Should Mind Their Own Business
Free polls from Pollhost.com

(Only 1 vote per I.S.P. address will register)

From the "Anita Project" Trenches: Fran's Live Report

Super Temp is back -- he's on another project, and he's got his eye on a Privilege QC Captain.

The associate is dating a girl who never spoke to anyone. She used to dress in cheap K-Mart low-cut tank tops until she started dating him - the best-dressed associate. Now she's getting preferential treatment, special projects; she comes in whenever she pleases, and she takes excessive breaks.

The associate was also flirting with another temp heavily, and there is speculation they were dating as well - I believe it's the same girl the Super Temp likes.

Crazy Temp, who allegedly slashed her bf's tires, is back to her antics again. It is widely known that she does not like black people and will go out of her way to get them all fired from the project. She's being courted by a tall and way-too-skinny guy that no one likes. They're perfect together.

Other romances keep popping up, but all the lovesick lovers are in denial.

"Galanzo," commented on in previous posts, is on the Anita project.

Do you remember "Ronald McDonald"? He replaced "Supertemp" when Supertemp left for the summer. He bosses everyone around like he's the coach of a football team. He even gets people to huddle.

Summer on the Anita Project

"Tons of gossip on the Anita project. One of the associates is dating a temp.

Tons of people axed.

Super Temp is gone.

Crops of other Super Temps popped up.

The A/C blew out."

-- Anonymous Source, "Fran": (Fed up - Really - Anonymous -Newssource)

Ann Israel: The Propaganda Queen

This may in fact, be one way of understanding propaganda: a discursive promotion of the interests and agenda of an overarching or specific power regime.

--Michel Foucault, philosopher

Every exploitative system needs propaganda. The legal profession is no exception. A profession that viciously fires its young workers for talking to the media about work conditions in cock-roach infested basements clearly needs a steady stream of "blame the victim" propaganda to sustain itself.

Ann Israel is the legal profession's very own propaganda queen. Week in, week out the propaganda queen's hate-filled writings are published nationally in American Lawyer Media Publications. Under the guise of providing unbiased and balanced career advice to law students and young attorneys, Ann Israel's column is, in actuality, nothing more than a pipeline of biglaw partner propaganda.

Last week, the propaganda queen actually had the audacity to claim that she never blames victims. Perusing some of her past columns (which isn't an easy thing to do given her blatantly condescending and child-like writing style), I quickly learned that ALL the propaganda queen seems to do is blame the employee. In her own words:

"Ouch! Very few people are going to believe that answer. You are unemployed and that big U is your scarlet letter."

"Once you start your new firm, hunker down and plan on doing things right. Instead of all-night partying, you need to spend your free time studying the law."

"But even more egregious than your excuses is what you have to say about your current job. How dare you speak in such a manner about a decent and honest profession."

"Stop thinking that you are better than your job. Were you able to get out of bed this morning and get dressed by yourself? Then you are a lucky man."

------------------------------------------------------------------------

She's the Dr. Laura of legal advice. People write to her because they know she will shit all over them. -- random autoadmit poster

http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=530457&mc=42&forum_id=2

Anita Project: The Post-Mortem

a) It was totalitarian. Early on people were being fired for all kinds of random reasons. (eg. playing a game of minesweeper, not sitting up straight, for making a quick, random call on a cell-phone). The rules were strict and the scrutiny was intense. The only thing that was missing was a heavy-set German woman in a military uniform barking out orders.

b) It was a paranoid work environment. The random firings, lack of adequate communication, and distortions of truth created an atmosphere of paranoia and distrust that never went away. People would constantly comment on how they had to check their cell-phones every morning in order to make sure they hadn't been fired the night before.

c) Dishonesty.
--Hiring vast amounts of people, claiming that there was plenty of work, and then firing them only a week later.
--Publicly announcing a project end date, denying it, and then firing over a dozen people on that end date.
--Denying that a "watch-list" existed when, in fact, one very much did exist.

d) Moles and Weasals. While they may have been an effective tool for the agencies and firms to gather intelligence, it engendered an atmosphere of distrust and divisiveness that led to a break-down in good old-fashioned teamwork.

e) Inadequate infrastructre.

The End.

More Paul Weiss Horror Stories

Yes, it is true that Paul Weiss has roaches crawling all over the room where the temp attorneys work. If you are in the basement of the UBS building, which is where PW places the majority of temp attorneys, roaches are crawling day and night. Once, I actually found a dead roach in my wallet when I returned home for the evening. Needless to say, I never had to sign out to use the bathroom, but I heard that temp attorneys that are located within the PW main offices upstairs were required to sign in and out. There is a reason why it is called the Plantation! But, that is okay because I got my freedom papers over a year ago!

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

A notoriously difficult place to work. Very low pay, strict hours, and a hierarchical environment where contract attorneys are expected to "know their place."

Source: www.tempatty.com

It Ain't Easy Finding The "Smoking Gun," When The Room You Are In Is Literally Smoking

Document Review involves the meticulous review of millions of highly complex and sensitive documents. Clients often pay top-dollar to ensure that their materials are being reviewed in a careful, diligent, and respectful manner. Unfortunately, in order to maximize profits, litigation profiteering middle-men often have cut back on infrastructure and other crucial essentials. In my opinion, conducting a responsible review under these conditions simply becomes counter-productive. Two examples from the "Anita" project are illustrative:

Every afternoon, thick, putrid, white smoke would emanate up from the deli downstairs. Scrambling to avoid the nauseating stench of decaying chicken-fat, people would work hand in hand to close several of the heavy, glass-paned 19th century windows.

The lack of adequate on-site bathroom facilities. Having two small, cramped air-plane sized restrooms for over 120 people is simply unsustainable. Many a time people have shot off the floor like rockets in an apparent mad-dash to relieve themselves. Some people have resorted to sneaking into the lobby of a hotel across the street in order to utilize their facilities. I started doing this myself when I found out that someone on the public internet terminal was researching on how to clear up a herpes and syphilis infection. Thankfully, after several weeks, project management saw the light and was kind enough to invest in paper toilet-seat covers.

The Sunday Night Massacre

I am getting numerous reports via e-mail that the axe has been swinging far and wide tonight. I don't have definitive numbers right now, but after I pick through some more of the bloody bodies I will get back to you.

So much for Anita's claim that the May 12th deadline was nothing more than a bunch of hype. Check out what Anita made Sally write two weeks ago:

From: {Sally}
To: {Temp Attorneys}
Subject: Don't Believe the Hype
Date: Thu, May 4, 2006

CC: {Anita}

Hi All,

A number of you have advised me of a rumor going around that the project is ending on May 12. THIS IS NOT TRUE. There is a May 12 deadline, but {Anita} has been consistently very clear that the deadline does NOT mean the end of the project. There may be a lag between the May 12 deadline and June 1, but the project is continuing.

Thank you for letting me know about the rumor, and please always let me know any time something like this comes up, so we can address it right away.

Please let me know if you have any additional questions or concerns.

Thanks All! You guys are the best.

{Sally}

Sharpening the Axe

Today, Anita pulled half of the project into a meeting. Apparently, she informed the group that their portion of the project would be ending on Monday. She pleaded with the group not to worry, however, as the firm was planning on creating "special projects" to keep the group employed until the second phase of the project begins in early June.

As far as I am concerned, the following may be happening:

a) Anita could be telling the truth

b) Anita will fire the group at the end of the week. Firing the entire group without notice would lower morale for those remaining on the project. {Why work hard at a place that engages in mass-layoffs without notice? -- you could be next!} The "special projects" story could have been fabricated in order to make it seem like Anita was doing everything in her power to keep everyone around. It would ease tensions.

c) Anita is trying to keep everyone around until the second phase of the project begins. In order to keep people from jumping onto other projects, Anita is enticing people to stay on with phantom projects. By the time people realize that they are being jerked around (by only being allowed to bill 20 hours per week), it will be too late to find other work. At that point, people will decide just to suck it up and remain on for the second half of the project.

Student Loan Justice

Law Loans are often the chains of bondage that trap hoards of young people into years of crushing white-collar slavery. With non-dischargeable student loan payments often in excess of $1,000 monthly, one has little choice but to put up with the exploitive antics of Anita and Alfred Youngwood. There is a reason why people subject themselves to working with dead cockroaches and in sweatshops right out of the 19th century:

"Since 1997, student loans have become the most profitable, uncompetitive, oppressive, and predatory type of debt of any in the nation. This has occurred due to legislation that was paid for by the the lobbying machine of Sallie Mae, the largest student loan company in America. Vast personal fortunes are being made by both Sallie Mae executives, and others who paid for this legislation, at the expense of decent citizens who were not able to capitalize on their education. This has effectively crippled MILLIONS of decent citizens who want to repay their original debt, but are prevented from doing so by staggeringly higher amounts being demanded from them by both "non-profit", and for-profit student loan companies. This has truly created a swath of economic destruction across our land."

"According to Harvard Professor Elizabeth Warren in a Wall Street Journal piece by John Hechinger last year, "Student-loan debt collectors have power that would make a mobster envious."

Anyone who has the gumption to walk off Anita's project and anyone who dares to tell that abusive sidekick of hers to go to hell will have to contend with an angry mobster from the student-loan industry. Can anyone say leadpipe?

http://www.studentloanjustice.org/

An Iron-Will

"Crunch Time" continues. I apologize for not have written in the last couple of days. After 14 hours straight of staring into a dull, luminescent screen, the last thing I wanted to do was to go home and write on a blog. Frankly, I really think this job is starting to get to me. Walking out of work the other day, I felt faint, my vision became blurred, and I felt like I was going to pass out on the sidewalk. Many of my fellow co-workers and I are becoming worn-out. The level of after-hours drinking on the project has increased dramatically. Natalie's answer to this, by the way, is to throw an after the "crunch-time" drinking party. Personally, I think the money can be better spent in hiring an on-site AA counselor. Just a suggestion.

One particular individual on the project billed close to 95 hours last week! Talk about an iron-will! In order to accomplish this particular feat, he/she would have needed to stare into a luminescent screen in a tight, cramped work space for close to 13.5 hours a day (without any breaks) for seven straight days. If he/she was able to pull this off without the use of any chemical substances, my hat goes off to him/her.

Eat Your Wheaties

Anita has really cranked up the hours. Ideally, she wants us to work as many hours possible from 7 a.m. - 10 p.m. (9 a.m. - 8 p.m. on the weekends). Natalie, the lady from the agency, came down and told us that she knows how difficult it is to stare into a luminescent screen for 12 hours a day (right, I am sure she does!), but that we should try our best by eating our Wheaties in the morning. Wheaties? I am going to need more than Wheaties to get through a 14 hour day/7 days of week of document review. How about a valium?

The Friday Night Massacre

Friday Nights are usually the time of the week when the greatest number of mass-layoffs occur. This slash-and-burn technique gives the firms the ability to squeeze the greatest amount of labor out of burnt-out temps without having to pay for weekend overtime. It fattens the wallets of people like Alfred Youngwood. {Paul Weiss layoffs are especially cruel and deceptive. I have heard a bunch of accounts where people have been told to take their belongings with them during their lunch breaks due to "custodial maintenance." Minutes later, while at lunch, people receive the calls from their agencies informing them not to return to work.}

Many people believe that Anita's project is headed towards a "Friday Night Massacre." Although this project has been going through people like water through a sieve since its inception, the intensity and arbitrariness of the firings seems to have increased ten-fold. (note the recent firings of "McCauley Culkin" and the "Vivacious Italian Vixen"). Despite a workspace filled nearly to capacity, Anita has been busy all week interviewing new recruits. Meanwhile, her sidekick has been busy trolling up and down the aisles looking for fresh firing victims. He keeps a watchlist, is eager to find space for Anita's new recruits, and is voraciously thirsty for temp blood. Stay under the radar, or you might very well become a victim of the next Friday Night Massacre!

Sex and the Sweatshop

Stacking people on top of each other for 10-12 hrs. a day in sweatshop-type conditions is bound to create for some interesting social dynamics. On Anita's project, Cupid seems to have struck in some pretty unlikely places. Lovers' quarrels, hysterical crying, twisted love triangles, and vicious jealousy are now the order of the day. Interestingly enough, it seems as if there is a psychological explanation for all of this amorous insanity:

Since the mid-1980s, Cindy Hazan, an associate professor of human development at Cornell University in Ithaca, New York, has been looking into why we pair up the way we do. It turns out we long to be close to those close by.

Just as an infant forms a special attachment to his mother or caregiver, adult mates become attached to each other through a similar mechanism, Hazan and her colleagues believe. Attachment helps to secure an infant's survival; the bond between adults, while not quite so vital, provides the security and reliability they need to thrive.

Whether it's Mom or your wife-to-be, the presence of your beloved triggers the release of oxytocin, a hormone that induces a state of contentment and stimulates a desire for continued close physical contact. "Proximity is really the core of attachment. Familiar people have a calming, soothing effect on us," says Hazan. Zookeeper's logic applies here: Put two members of any species in the same cage, and they are bound to mate.

This scenario is often played out in the cage that is the workplace, where like-minded humans of both sexes are locked up for eight- to 10-hour days. "When you ask someone why he got together with someone else" Hazan says, "he will never say, 'Well, she was just hanging around,' but propinquity is a big factor. When you have repeated contact with someone, your attraction to them increases. If we have evolved to reproduce, then we shouldn't have to wander around the earth searching for an ideal partner."

What about fate bringing you and your soul mate together, no matter how many miles or office complexes away? "I'm reluctant to pooh-pooh the idea of true love, because it's such a treasured view in our culture," says Hazan. "But there is no empirical evidence to support it. First of all, anyone who has been infatuated more than once and has felt each time, 'This is the person for me!' knows it's wrong. From an evolutionary perspective, it makes zero sense."

We might declare, "I wouldn't date Bob if he were the last man on earth!" But Hazan thinks Bob would grow on us, and that a slow burn over time could boil into a full-blown romance.

Along with proximity, the attachment machine is fueled by stress. In 1973, four Swedes held in a bank vault for six days became enamored of their captors; the incident gave rise to the term "Stockholm syndrome." When 19-year-old publishing heiress Patty Hearst was kidnapped by the Symbionese Liberation Army in 1974, she was soon toting a gun, calling herself Tania and extorting money from her own family.

Hazan says that people nearby are likely partners in stressful situations, because of our natural tendency to seek comfort. "Any port in a storm will do," she says. On September 11, 2001, some strangers who were forced to walk across the Brooklyn Bridge together, or who were trapped in small spaces, reportedly clung tightly to their serendipitous "dates."

--Psychology Today, Jan/04: "Close quarters: Why we fall in love with the one nearby"

Get out the Kleenex. It is going to be a long Spring.

CLAUDIA

All has been quiet on the Anita project.

April has arrived. Three solid months of repetitive document review is beginning to take its toll. The psychological stress is slowly building. Document Review is psychologically stressful; anyone who tells you otherwise is either lying. I dare anyone, while reviewing thousand of pages of spreadsheets, to stare into a dim, luminescent screen for 1o hrs a day. It is made even more stressful at places, such as Paul Weiss, where you are forced to work 12 hour shifts in roach-infested basements. After weeks of being exposed to such soulless, mindless drudgery, people simply start to go batty. Obviously, some people are better able to handle this "stress" than others. One person who apparently buckled under the pressure was Claudia. After being on Anita's project since its inception, Claudia was evidently fired last week.

Claudia started exhibiting signs of a breakdown several weeks ago. People sitting around her noticed that she would spontaneously laugh out loud and repeatedly (under her breath) mutter, "shit, this shit, I can't take this shit."

Last week, Claudia's modest display of looniness exploded into a full-fledged case of paranoid schizophrenia. Apparently, the voices within Claudia's head caught wind of a large governmental conspiracy in which Anita, in conjunction with the document production company, the agencies, the law firms, and the United States Government were "out to get her." Claudia especially had it in for super-temp, whom she saw as being the mastermind behind the grand conspiracy. With arms flailing, Claudia would constantly chase after, hunt down, and curse out Anita, super-temp, and the first-year associates. I have to admit it was sort of amusing to see.

Eliot Spitzer: Your Former Employer Is Firing People For Talking To The Media About Work/Safety Issues

From a fellow poster:

Hello Spitzer campaign team,

There is an interesting discussion about Elliot happening at this blog, in the comments section: http://temporaryattorney.blogspot.com/ I really think that he should deal with the problem of horrid working conditions at Paul Weiss, his old firm, and large Democratic contributors. Temp attorneys {and paralegals, and other legal support personnel} have been {allegedly} exposed to fire hazards, racism, overcrowded work areas, low pay, etc. Elliot Spitzer should address this as our AG, but perhaps this problem could be solved if he just talked to the partners at Paul Weiss and advised them to improve working conditions for contract attorneys. {and paralegals, and other legal support personnel}. I apologize that I have to remain anonymous, but it is for work-related reasons. Thank you.

Yes, Mr. Spitzer. Your current office is granted with statutory authority to investigate these allegations. If you really cared about fhe working-class people in New York State, you would look into these claims of labor abuse and retaliatory discharge.

Democrats: Stay Home This Year!

Alfred Youngwood makes financial contributions to the Democratic Party. If the following allegations are any indication, the Democratic Party has lost its direction. I urge all Democrats to stay home this year.

Tom -
{removed for privacy reasons}. The only days I'd had off were {} some weekends....hours of 9:30 - 11. Ugg.

I was working in the sweatshop of Paul Weiss under the supervision {removed for privacy reasons}. She was nice to me at times and at others would ask if I was billing my smile to office general. She would often make comments about what I ate, telling me that was why I was getting fat, etc, in front of the rows of people at my hellish former job. This was in addition to her announcing to myself that being a plantation manager was in her blood and motioning to the rows of African Americans working. We used to have to sign out to go to the bathroom, (I'm {X years old} and an admitted attorney), until someone started farting so much it was disturbing the entire room. We couldn't eat at our spaces and were constantly hovered. Nothing like passive aggressive bullshit.

Anyway, the point is, they blame you for the removal of all of the JD's from the projects at the hell that is Paul Weiss. Frankly, I don't care, because I am collecting unemployment, looking for a real job.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

In 2004 there were about 100 "jd paras" crammed into 2 concourse level basement rooms. One had aboout 6 inches of space on either side before rubbing up against the next person. Many of the people in those rooms were licensed attorneys.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hey Tom,

Thanks for writing back. Weiss is a true hellhole, worse than I expected. All the fire exits are blocked w/ boxes of documents, we have to use a public, concourse-level bathroom where homeless people bathe and "groom" (and preach the Gospel, too) there was a roach problem recently from other temps leaving food/crap in the basement, so the place stink of roach spray/bombs and there's Combat roach motels all over the place. The computer monitors are circa 1989 and the tubes are going bad, so the docs are very hard to read as the type/fonts are blurry. Also the ducting from the offices is ripped apart from a half-assed construction project and hot stale air from above pours in & makes the work space a constant 82-85 degrees.
On the bright side, there is no supervision whatsoever. Most people spend 1/2 to 3/4 of the day bullshitting, doing puzzles/games, reading pulp novels, and listening to ipods, etc. I feel like a leper.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hey Tom,

Weiss pulled a real bait & switch- 2 days after I started they bumped the mandatory weekday hour from 9 am -8:30 pm to 9am- 11pm! A fourteen hour day! We must take an hour lunch and a half-hour dinner, both unpaid, so we get paid for a 12.5 hour day! And 10-6 on Sat. is also required. Like it or lump it! All this for $21 an hour straight, time & half for OT. And we had a meeting today where the staff lawyer basically told us we were all morons, and to NEVER bother or speak to or breath near a real associate, b/c they don't have time to waste w/ us peons. She tried halfway hard not to be too condesceding, but it really does come screaming thru! She's always sending emails that begin w/ "Don't take this the wrong way, but..........."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Being a biglaw attorney or doc. reviewer is truly the most miserable job in the world. I have never felt so utterly abused, degraded, condescened to, and just plain worthless. Weiss is the most miserable environment I've ever worked in.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I feel like a leper. You were right on with your comparison to Triangle Shirtwaist. When I leave Weiss I'm calling 311 and reporting them for fire code violations, though they're so rich and connected I doubt anything would happen.

Following the Publication of Julie Triedman's Article, Why Is Paul Weiss Firing People?

4/02/06- Good Job, Mr. Youngwood! This weekend I spoke to one of the people that you fired. This person was smart, engaging, and well-credentialed. By firing this individual (and many others like him/her), you did your clients a huge disservice. As a fellow poster recently said:

Firing JD's is a token resistance that will only result in negligence, malpractice, and professional embarassment for any firm using such tactics.

Wake up! Paralegals cannot make substantive legal judgments regarding responsiveness and privilege. Do you really think defense firms are going to risk producing reams of privileged documents to hungry plaintiff's firms? Or not producing documents they are required to produce under procedural law. Paralegals are simply not equipped to understand the substantive distinctions between responsiveness and non-responsiveness, especially in cases involving complex legal issues and hundreds of thousands of documents. A competent plaintiff's firm would benefit immensively from sloppy discovery work. Privilege judgments are extremely important and associates routinely blow privilege calls and produce privileged documents, even smoking guns, that should not be produced. How much worse would it be with paralegals doing the first level reviews?

Have some repect for the skills required to perform your job.

The question is will Mr. Youngwood have respect for our work?

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

3/31/06- Today, I received the following e-mail. It is from a source with a verifiable/proveable identity. Apparently, the e-mail was written by a Paul Weiss Supervisor:

Hi {name removed for privacy reasons},

{removed for privacy reasons}. We also wanted you to know that it was not our fault that you were let go from the project. That happened from way on high, because of Tom the Temp and his blog/news article. Since the article said the JD's were coding documents ours was the team that got hit... All the JD"s are now gone and we have to retrain all non-JD people to replace them. It all sucked big time!

Anyway, {removed for privacy reasons}. Good luck with the job search, I am sure if you don't already have something that you soon will.

Take care and keep in touch.

{name removed for privacy reasons}

Wow! What an admission. Could it actually be the case that Paul Weiss is firing people for speaking to the media about safety and ethical violations? Need I remind Alfred Youngwood that whistleblowing is a legally protected activity?

The only way to deal with these problems is by improving the working conditions/raising the pay of temporary employees, and by reducing fees/providing better value to clients. The answer will not be found in mass-firings.

Tom the Temp Respectfully Requests A Meeting With Mr. Alfred Youngwood

4/1/06- Received several shocking e-mails today. You are not going to believe it. Details in the next posting. Stay tuned!

3/31/06- Still no word from Mr. Youngwood. He must be getting ready for the long weekend. While we are waiting, here is an e-mail which details the extreme level of micro-management that these poor souls have to face on a daily basis, in the Paul Weiss roach-infested basement:

Hello Everyone:

We would like to thank you all for your hard work, however, it has been brought to our attention that some of the firm's policies are being violated. We do understand that we work long hours here and that sometimes we all have things to do during lunch or dinner. We also understand that sometimes people have to take the morning off and come in at the lunch break. In addition, we know that we have been allowing you to continue eating full meals at your desk after the lunch or dinner hour has passed, while billing the client. Many of you will not be happy, but as of today this practice has to stop.

Going forward if you come in at the lunch break, you are not to bring your lunch with you and bill the client for eating. A snack at your desk while working is fine, but it is not acceptable to eat the whole meal unless you are on a break. We are sorry for any inconvenience this may cause.

More so, many of you are also spending time playing games, reading newspapers/magazines, sending text messages and even watching DVDs, this too must end. We are here to do a job, and even though many of you find it mind numbing and as boring as can be, playing games, reading newspapers and watching movies must be done during your break time.

Please let us know if you have any questions or comments about this email. Thank you for your compliance and your hard work.

Staff JD Litigation Clerk
Paul, Weiss, Rifkind, Wharton & Garrison LLP
1285 Avenue of the Americas
New York, NY 10019-6064


3/30/06- No word yet from Mr. Youngwood. I am sure he is very busy. He need not concern himself with the fact that dozens of the youngest, most vulnerable members of his profession are working with dead cockroaches in sweatshop-type conditions. Tom the Temp and Chuckles the Chicken may just have to pay Paul Weiss an in-person visit.

3/28/06- E-mail Sent.

Dear Mr. Youngwood,

I am the author of the anonymous blog -- http://temporaryattorney.blogspot.com. I was wondering if you could spare some time to discuss the issues discussed in the blog and in Julie Triedman's article. Many people have been unfairly dismissed for bringing these issues up with their agencies.

Tom the Temp


Since the agencies are too busy pandering and aren't available to ask the tough questions, I respectfully request a meeting with Mr. Alfred Youngwood, the managing partner of Paul Weiss.

I would like to know:

a) Why doesn't Paul Weiss engage in fair labor practices with regards to its temps, particularly recent graduates with no source of income, esteem, or direction?

b) How does Paul Weiss justify charging a client over $200 an hour to have a $21 an hour minion review documents in sweatshop-type conditions with dead cockroaches?

c) What is Paul Weiss doing to improve the unsanitary and unsafe working conditions of its temps?

I would also like to refresh Mr. Youngwood's recollection with regards to something he said in Julie Triedman's article. In it, he mentioned that, "some 'J.D. paras' work on the concourse level." I would personally like to remind Mr. Youngwood that I worked on the concourse level. I was employed as (and billed out as) an admitted attorney, not as a J.D. paralegal.

Witch-Hunts

The witch-hunts are on! I knew it was only a matter of time.

At Paul Weiss, Alfred Youngwood allegedly had a large lunch for all of the temps last week. Apparently, the firm has been trying to figure out who has been speaking to the media.

At another firm (which I promised not to name), an agency warned all incoming temps that a certain "troublemaker" (a.k.a. suspected blogger) was on the project.

On my project, the names of suspected bloggers are flying around the room. I wouldn't be surprised if the agencies have created (and are now leaking) a "short-list" of suspected bloggers.

None of this phases me. I am now at a point where I have learned to ignore the dirty tricks, gross exploitation, and petty politics of the agencies and firms. I can't control what others may do. All I can do now is concentrate on serving the corporate client in the best way that I can (which I am proudly paid to do), and by speaking out against an inefficient, unethical, corrupt, and exploitative system of legal services delivery.

Economic Efficiency

Somebody left the following comment:

"Anyone who comes out publicly for temp rights at this point will never work in this town again.

The agencies just crew the ship and throw the bodies to the side.

The issue is whether we will allow the greedy partners at the large firms to continue to inflate their revenue at the public's expense by exploiting us. The increased costs to the clients are simply passed off to the public.

If the partners were not so greedy the firms would hire more people permanently to properly get the job done. If they even cared about the quality of the review work, which the don't. They really only care about bilking the client as much as possible so they can afford a bigger house in the Hamptons."

-- I couldn't have said it better myself.

Goldilox And The Three Moles

I work in a highly paranoid work environment. Every move made by Anita is carefully dissected, analyzed, re-analyzed, and scrutinized by the temps to the 9th degree. The simple occurrence of Anita being out for the day can generate hours worth of wild speculation and rumor-mongering. {Tom the Temp understands this phenomena. When you mislead people with regards to project duration/conditions, etc., this is the kind of work environment that you generate.}

The most recent rumor to pop up amongst the temps is that the worksite is loaded with moles. {A mole is a temporary attorney who secretly agrees to collect intelligence on his/her fellow co-workers in exchange for a higher pay rate. People are currently speculating that the "mole bounty" has recently increased due to the fact that the agencies/firms are so desperate to catch Tom the Temp.}

Who do people suspect are the moles? Well, for starters, we have Goldilox and the Bungling Bear. The two of them sit together all day, and they hardly speak to anyone. They are constantly whispering to one another and have been known to spend long periods of time sealed within Anita's glass-encased cubicle. Recently, it is alleged, they brought in "Mother Jones," their co-hort, who sits on the other side of the room. "Mother Jones" is rumored to have a special pad where she writes down all the intelligence that she has gathered on her cigarette breaks.

That leaves three moles. Well, what about the fourth? Who could it be? Could it be you? Could it be me? Could it be Tom the Temp? The paranoia goes on.

American Lawyer Magazine

Check out Julie Triedman's article from the March issue of American Lawyer Magazine:

March 2006 SECTION: BARTALK Vol. 28

SLAVES OF NEW YORK;
Law firm temps are furiously blogging about their work conditions

AT 4 P.M. DOWN IN the basement of a large New York firm, a temporary attorney plots his escape. After days of staring into a flickering computer screen for 12 hours, he can't bear to code another document. The temp's destination is modest: a Starbucks across the street. But aside from lunch and bathroom breaks, he can't leave the floor. If he does, he'll lose his job.

At another firm, the temps were first assigned to a conference room with a window, but then transferred to a room they call "the pit."

These are the kinds of stories temps tell each other from the comfort of their anonymous blogs. And to hear them tell it, working conditions are awful now that law firms are hiring more temps to do the drudge work formerly reserved for associates.

There is Temporary Attorney, whose anonymous protagonist, "Tom the Temp," says he was downsized from a big firm; DC Temp, written by a self-described "attorney in waiting"; and Cribspace, whose author claims to be a 28-year-old licensed attorney recently employed at Cravath, Swaine & Moore. The relevant URLs are dctemp.blogspot.com, temporaryattorney.blogspot.com, and cribspace.blogspot.com.

One reason for the surge in temp work is that firms now perform more discovery than ever. Another is that many grads of second- and third-tier law schools are unable to land associate jobs at big firms. Rather than take a low salary at a small firm, they sign on for steady temp work with the big firms. (New York Law School, for example, says that its 2004 grads at small firms earn between $35,000 and $51,000.)

By contrast, temp agencies pay $19 to $25 an hour to unlicensed J.D.s. Licensed J.D.s can earn up to $35 per hour, and specialized lawyers can top $100 an hour, say two staffing agency recruiters. Most temps are paid time and a half when they work more than 40 hours.
But oh, the pain of it all. At most firms, temps do online document review, a process that involves reading e-mail and documents and tagging them with a code that states their relevance to the case at hand. It's grueling work, made more so by their invisibility.

"Tom the Temp" has sparked a lively debate by declaring the system inefficient and urging temps to unionize. But one of his anonymous posters calls the system efficient, saying, "The bottom line is that utilization of [temps] increases the revenue stream, and profits, for the partners at the firms where [they] are utilized." Otherwise, the source says, firms wouldn't use them.

That opinion was seconded by a partner at a top New York firm who spoke on condition of anonymity. This source says he uses temp lawyers because he can bill the work to clients at associate rates, or $180?$200 an hour. His firm pays the agencies $50?$65 per hour and pockets the rest. (Recruiters confirm those agency rates, but say that rates and law firm markups are dropping.)

One firm in particular has come under fire for its work conditions: Paul, Weiss, Rifkind, Wharton & Garrison, which Tom recently named "Sweatshop of the Year."

Tom's complaints were corroborated by a Paul, Weiss temp who provided proof of his employment and spoke on condition of anonymity. This source says he was one of 40 temps working 12-hour stints six days a week at the firm's New York office. He says they were corralled in a windowless basement room littered with dead cockroaches, and that six of seven exits were blocked.

Paul, Weiss managing partner Alfred Youngwood concedes that some "J.D. paras" work on the "concourse level" and that in one room a few exits are blocked. But, he says, the firm complies with safety codes. He declines to say how much the firm bills clients for the work. These "are not the people who are getting billed out at $200 an hour," he says. "They're not doing legal work."

The Paul, Weiss temp disagrees. Along with coding for responsiveness, he says, he is expected to review for privilege. "It's true we spend probably 80 percent of the day bullshitting and wandering around," this temp confides. "But when you're paying an attorney $20 an hour, what do you expect?"

Stupid Policy

Everyone looks forward to mid-week. Every Wednesday or Thursday, a woman from the agency which owns the site comes around and hands out paychecks. Temp Attorneys, however, who are members of any of the "other" agencies that staff the project do not receive paychecks. Here is an e-mail that one of my colleagues (who works for one of those "other" agencies) received from his/her recruiter. The e-mail dates back to 1/20/06. Relevant portions are highlighted in bold. I thought I would leave in the non-relevant parts to give you a flavor of what was going on earlier on in the project.

Hi All,

First of all, Thank You for your patience with the {computer software} delays that resulted in the unexpected “days off” today and tomorrow. [little did we know that in two short weeks we were going to have a whole week off! -ttt]. As you know, the first few weeks of a project are always the toughest, while systems are being put in place and everyone is settling in, adjusting to a new work environment and its unique culture.

Second, I just wanted to remind everyone of the importance of making a good first impression in these initial days in order to establish the client’s confidence in your reliability and commitment to the project. While the feedback we’ve gotten from the client has been extremely positive, we wanted to make you aware of one issue that did arise, so that you can avoid this problem going forward.

Apparently, within the first work week, there were a number of people with sudden needs to be absent, arrive late, leave early, or otherwise take time off. While most of these people were not members of {agency's} team, it was a large enough number of people overall that the client flagged it as an issue to raise with everyone.

Unfortunately, the nature of this project does not allow flexibility in the number of hours worked, or when you work them. As you know, the hours are 9:00 a.m. to 8:00 p.m., 6 days per week. While we understand that emergencies do happen and that things like doctor’s appointments are important, “eleventh-hour” notice of a previously scheduled commitment is not acceptable. If you know ahead of time that you will need to take time away from the project, you must let us and the site supervisor know as far in advance as possible. Just so you know, because of the size of the project and the fact that it is being staffed by multiple agencies, the client is being extremely vigilant, noting not only which individual contractors are the most reliable and productive, but which agency’s teams perform better overall than the others. We know you are head and shoulders above the rest!

Finally, we apologize that we have not come over to visit with you, which ordinarily we would have done by now. It turns out that {agency which owns the site} has a policy of not allowing competitors into their space [and if it were up to {Anita}, she would be happy for us to come by]. We are disappointed about this policy because, as most of you know, we do like to stay in touch personally as much as possible – to say hello, to hear about any issues or concerns you may have, etc. So since we can't come to see you, we will be finding other ways to keep in touch and express to you our appreciation of all your hard work.

As always, please call or e-mail us any time if there's anything you want to talk about relating to the project [or anything else] – We’re here.

Have a great weekend!

{Sally}

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Here was the solution devised in response to the apparent lockout: {it seems as if Tom the Temp has created his very own lexicon. Please distinguish the term "lockout" from "lockdown"}.

2/28/06

Hi Everyone,

Just wanted to let you know that I will be at the Starbucks on the corner of 29th and Park Ave. South from 3 – 4 p.m. again tomorrow, Wednesday, March 1.

If you feel like taking a break during that time, please come by for refreshments!

Have a great evening,

{Sally}

In order to pick up their checks, your telling me that a group of my fellow co-workers have to trek up to some street corner in Manhattan like a bunch of hookers? Oh, Give Me A Freaking Break! This policy appears to make no sense; it seems vindictive and mean-spirited, and it appears as if its only justification is to spite the other agencies. The temps, as they usually do, have to pay the price. It's freezing out -- many people risk becoming sick, and many of them do not have health insurance. The temps also have to put up with the added annoyance of clocking out and losing a half an hour worth of pay. It appears as if there are a group of people on my project who are being treated like second-class citizens. If this stupid policy does not cease, or if this policy is not justified in some way, I am going to publicly announce the name of the agency that is responsible.

This is something that Anita should have thought about before signing the agency contract. Once again, she was probably too entranced by the glass-encased cubicles to realize otherwise.

"Stench Soup"

This is disgusting, but it has to be told:

Today, I got sick at work. At around midday, I decided that I would make quick use of the bathroom. BIG MISTAKE! They must have turned off the ventilation system for the weekend. The stench was so overwhelmingly putrid that as soon as I walked into the cramped, foul-smelling bathroom, I gagged and almost threw up into the sink. It wasn't pretty. I took away from this experience two very important lessons: a) never use the restroom on the weekends b) during the week, never use the restroom after 3 p.m. Certainly, there is a hard-working custodian on-site who tries his best to deal with an untenable situation. Constantly cleaning two small, cramped bathrooms -- which are constantly being used by over 100 people -- is, however, a losing proposition. If Anita only had kept this in mind when choosing a site (instead of focusing on how many glass-encased cubicles there were going to be), we would be in much better shape.

I have an idea that can save the American taxpayers millions of dollars:

By way of the Los Angeles Times, I have learned about a new military initiative. The Pentagon actually has a multimillion dollar research and development program to make weapons that can stink an enemy into surrender.These weaponized stinks are pressurized into "canisters" that are to be launched at enemy troops, crowds of protesters, or any other targets deemed worthy of effervescent smells. They even come in different aromas. One of the "malodorants" (the Pentagon term) bears the label "Bathroom Malador" and it is described as having "a strongly fecal smell, with sharp notes of spoiled eggs and an undertone of rotting rodent." "Stench Soup" has such a foul odor that it "fills the mind with white noise." Wow!

Why not call up the Pentagon and inform them that we have come up with our very own version of "Stench Soup"? Just an idea.

Is Anita Back?

I received the following e-mail yesterday from someone on my project. It concerns an e-mail that he/she received from one of the agencies regarding the project. Tom the Temp's comments in bold.

Tom the Temp,

Anita may have been gone physically today but her handiwork is alive and well as evident by the below email from her agents at one of the agencies (looks like the old Anita is back).

Hi Everyone,

I hope you are all well. {doing okay aside from my mild case of carpal tunnel}. Thank you again for weathering what I know has been a rocky month {more than a month, it is March already} or so on this project. I understand from the folks who are running the site that things are about to pick up however, and I thought this would be a good time to remind you of some general policies {rules} that must be followed:

First, make absolutely sure that you sign in and sign out accurately, and that what you record on the sign in/sign out sheet is consistent with what you record on your timesheets. {don't overbill - I hope the "vanishing princess" isn't on this project}.

Second, cell phone use, internet use, {we don't have internet, remember?} and other personal/recreational activities {we weren't playing squash or anything} like puzzles – other than when you are on your breaks – must be kept to a very bare minimum. {not just a bare minimum, but a "very" bare mininum} We have received complaints about excessive {that is a strong word} amounts of all three activities. This policy may have been relaxed during the slow weeks, but it is VERY important again starting now and going forward. {sign that "lockdown" is coming}.

Finally, just a reminder that the attorneys managing the site do have the ability to track exactly what work you have done on a daily basis and when. {big brother is watching} If they feel they have any reason to question your attention to the work, they will verify your productivity, and low numbers combined with things like cell phone use, etc. will be a basis for being removed from the project. {this is fair - hopefully, however, no more public executions for people caught with a game of minesweeper}.

Thank you all for taking note of these policies. We reiterate them not to harass you, but to make absolutely clear what is expected, so that no one is asked to leave the project for failure to follow them out of lack of notice. {thanks for the heads up. I just wish that all of the agencies would have informed their candidates. I didn't receive any notice}.

Please be in touch and let us know how else we can support you throughout the project.
Again, with many thanks.

Is this just a friendly reminder, or a sign that we are on the verge of another "lockdown." Only time will tell.

Dangerous Ideas

"Intellectual freedom is the right of every individual to both seek and receive information from all points of view without restriction. It provides for free access to all expressions of ideas through which any and all sides of a question, cause or movement may be explored. Intellectual freedom encompasses the freedom to hold, receive and disseminate ideas."

The freedom to express ideas is dead on my project. Apparently, when one attempts to log onto my site from work, the message "access denied" appears on the screen. It appears as if my site has joined the ranks of those "banned" materials which espouse dangerous ideas. Undoubtedly, employers have the right to restrict internet access and deny the viewing of certain sites. But why take the trouble to block my site? Could it be that they consider my site "dangerous"? What could be so "dangerous" about my site? Could it be that I pointed out the fact that temps in general make only 1/8th of what they are billed out for? Could it be that they didn't like the negative media attention generated when I pointed out that the temps on my project were being treated more like animals, rather than as human beings? Perhaps. Just a hunch.

Please do not allow anyone to "chill" your freedom of speech rights. I am noticing a disturbing trend in which the number of daily hits continues to be as high as ever, but the number of comments posted has continued to fall. Please post and get your message out. In posting, just use common sense.

Round 2

And The Great Project Resumes......

Just A Note

2/9/06 - 8 p.m.-

I just had to respond to this comment.

"Everything you say may be based in reality but like a bad made for tv movie you like to stretch the truth to make your plight seem more dramatic."

Is it not true that someone was publicly humilated and fired for playing a game of minesweeper?

Is it not true that at 7 p.m. one night someone came out, told us to be quiet, and tried to pick a fight with us? How about that?

What about the supervisor telling people to sit up straight?

What about the "watch-list" that Anita admitted to?

Remember when the new people arrived on the project? Is it not true that the belongings of the old people were just tossed off the table like trash?

What about all of those tables stacked in front of the fire exit by the women's bathroom?

Is it not true that the project closed down for a week without notice, depriving people of the ability to land other projects so they could feed their families? Am I also making that up?

These are the facts. Deal with it. I would love to report on the improving work conditions on this project or any other project. All I see now, however, is a calculated public-relations campaign designed to uncover my identity and distort the truth.

Big "Owl" Is Watching You

A paranoid work environment is an environment which exhibits a pervasive pattern of distrust and suspiciousness. Namely, an inability to trust, distortion and fabrication, pathological mind-control, and instinctive aggressive counter-attack.

It's 2/2/06. All is quiet on the temp attorney floor. The quiet, humdrum of the constant clicking is the only noise which fills a lifeless room. Gasp! As quickly as lightning shoots across the summer sky, Anita emerges from her glass-encased cubicle. A sudden chill fills the air. Several temps caught off-guard by Anita's sudden emergence scatter to the wind. As we all have become acutely aware of Anita's tendency to feed upon her unsuspecting prey, we all brace.

Anita gazes around the room. Seemingly not in the mood to pick off another temp, Anita, in an apparent fit of boredom, heads off toward the Xerox machine. In stunned silence, we quietly watch as she photocopies and hangs up around the room over a half a dozen owl pictures. "Attention everyone," shouts Anita. "Don't read anything into this. The owls mean nothing. This is just to prevent you all from walking head-first into the glass-encased cubicles." As quickly as she emerged, Anita once again seals herself off within her glass cube.

The temps, meanwhile, stare at each other in stunned disbelief. What can this all mean? Of all things, why a picture of an owl? Why not a "beware of the glass" sign? Could it be that we are all reading too much into this -- maybe we should take Anita's word at face value? Who knows. For the rest of the day, everytime I look up, an owl stares down into my workspace. His eyes, piercing and always watching, brood over a hopeless temp attorney dumping ground.

The Legal Sweatshop Award

Irony is the spice of life. I see it everywhere. Last month, law.com listed Paul Weiss as its 2006 Litigation Department of the Year. Noted for their deft strategy and dogged work, Paul Weiss was noted for steering its clients through some pretty turbulent years. In terms of their public-interest work, Paul Weiss was noted for its victory in defense of the Santa Fe Living Wage Ordinance, which will likely have widespread implications on other living wage campaigns throughout the United States. Ironically, when it comes to the way in which they treat their own temporary workers, it's Tom the Temp's belief that their record is less than satisfactory.

For a short while, I actually temped at this firm. The conditions were horrific. There were about 15 of us -- half former biglaw associates/half recent graduates -- packed into a small, windowless conference room. It appeared as if the room had previously served as a supply closet. Every morning, in order to reach our workspaces, we had to climb over one another. At my workstation, I wasn't able to extend my arms, nor was I able to lean back, as I would have pressed up against those working around me. Because the review was paper-based, throughout the day boxes upon boxes of discovery documents would pile up around the room. In an emergency, things could have gotten dicey. Talking was forbidden. A heavy-set paralegal would periodically come around and bellow out in a deep, baritone voice to do, "more workin' and less talkin'." Like a child, you had to sign out to use the restroom. Additionally, if you arrived to work more than a half an hour late, you would have been required to go home for the day. Stalinism prevailed, as people were constantly being fired for speaking out of line. One day, a middle-aged woman, who had recently been laid off from her in-house job, broke down in tears.

After a few days in this hell-hole of a job, I just had to get out. I hopped off the project. The agency wasn't pleased. Late one night, I received an angry call from the agency recruiter demanding to know, "How could I?" Like an un-housebroken puppy who had just urinated on her new carpet, she demanded to know, "How dare I leave the job!" I was forever after placed on the agency's blacklist.

I am not alone in my assessment of this project. In the last couple of weeks, I have received numerous e-mails and reports detailing the harsh work conditions that temp attorneys face at this particular firm. Here are just some of the comments:

"We have to use a public, concourse-level bathroom where homeless people bathe and groom, there was a roach problem recently from other people leaving food/crap in the basement, so the place stinks of roach spray/bombs and there's Combat roach motels all over the place"

"basement, mice, falling ceilings"

"it's an utter hell-hole"

"The computer monitors are circa 1989 and the tubes are going bad, so the docs are hard to read as the type/fonts are blurry"

"the worst of the worst in terms of temping"

"it's like working at a construction site"

"Exits are blocked with boxes, wires and workstations"

"$21 an hour for both admitted and non-admitted attorneys"

"There is no internet because they don't trust us and no cell-phones because we are in the basement"

"Weiss pulled a real Bait & Switch - 2 days after I started they bumped the mandatory weekday hours from 9 a.m.-8:30 p.m. to 9 a.m.-11 p.m! A fourteen hour day!"

"Weiss is the most miserable place I have ever worked at and I have had alot of blue-collar jobs"

"bathroom filthy and inadequate"

On behalf of Chuckles the Chicken, Tom the Temp now presents Paul Weiss with the Temp Attorney Legal Sweatshop Award. Congratulations!

{Tom the Temp's award is based on his own personal opinion, relating to his own first-hand observations and those e-mails and reports that he has received from those who also have temped there.)

Sudden Surprise

After putting up with Anita, today at 5 p.m., after slaving away all week to reach overtime, Anita's ever loyal sidekick and another burnt-out associate handed us a bomb-shell. Escape from Stalag 17, an avid Tom the Temp reader, couldn't have put what happened today better:

"Today the burnt-out associate spent the day on her throne {within her glass encased cubicle} and then gave audience at 5:15 to make the order 'off with their heads.' She closed it {the project} down for a week or more."

Apparently, after having been promised six months of steady employment (many of us turned down other projects based on this assumption), over 100 of us were suddenly, without notice, dumped out onto the sidewalk just three weeks after the project had commenced. We were told not to return back to work until Monday, February 13th. Tom the Temp understands the contingent nature of contract labor. The ruthlessness, however, of making false promises, of raising the false expectations of people (many of whom are raising children and/or paying mortgages) about overtime and project steadiness/duration is truly unconscionable.

Hey, Hey/Yo, Yo - The Eunuch Has Got To Go!

Someone finally told off the Eunuch!

The Eunuch is a weak bully. The purpose of bullying is to hide inadequacy. Good managers manage, bad managers bully. Bullies bully to hide their inadequacy and weakness, and to divert attention away from their incompetence.

Tonight, the Eunuch emerged from his glass-encased cube, as he typically does after Anita leaves for the day, ready to pick a fight. In a condescending tone, he announced to the weary-eyed group (many of whom had been working since 8 a.m.) that we were to stop talking immediately, as it was "only" 7 p.m.

Typically, this is the type of condescending crap that you learn to deal with when you accept one of these gigs. Sometimes, however, a turning point may be reached when the employee finally realizes that they are not dealing with a normal human being like themselves, but with a dysfunctional, disordered individual who feels the need to exploit a fraudulent and broken system. One brave individual realized this and defiantly shouted out the simple word "So," in response to the Eunuch's observation that it was only 7 p.m.

Boy, was the Eunuch pissed. He hammered, stammered, and spun around a few times before demanding to know, "Who said that!" The Eunuch then went on to threaten us, in his always prepubescent voice, by asking us if, "Anyone has a problem with that?"

Yeah, Eunuch. Tom the Temp has a problem with it. He is sick and tired of putting up with your crap -- with your demeaning and domineering management style; with the bitterness that you are causing; with the low morale that you generating throughout the project. I have come to the sudden realization that you have just got to go.

Anita and the Eunuch

Yesterday was another turbulent day at work. Anita informed us that we were not allowed to leave the floor, a.k.a. our crammed workspaces, without first signing out with her. This new rule will be strictly enforced (it applies even to those taking a two minute cigarette break) and anyone caught violating it will be fired on the spot. The Eunuch, meanwhile, stood nodding in agreement with the new resolution and kindly reminded us that we were still allowed to use the bathroom. He warned us, however, not to abuse the privilege and to spend as little time in there as possible.

Confusion ensued, however, when someone asked if this new rule applied to the use of the kitchen sink. Anita and the Eunuch appeared perplexed by the unexpected inquiry and told us that they would have to get back to us with the exact parameters of what constitutes a bathroom break.

Lockdown

Periodically, when you have 100 weary, strung-out temps forced to review documents for 11-12 hours per day and only 2-3 supervisors to oversee the whole dysfunctional operation, the project goes into something known as "lock-down" mode. In "lock-down" mode, woe to those who dare go to kitchen to grab a cup of coffee or even take an extended bathroom break. In "lock-down" mode all bets are off, it's every woman/man for him/herself.

It just happens that last Friday at 5p.m., the project unexpectedly shifted into "lock-down" mode. The perpetrator of this sudden shift was Anita, the project manager.

Anita, with her six foot male sidekick, begins to troll up and down the aisles. A thin, pale, middle aged man in the center of the room is clueless about what is about to hit him. Apparently, unaware of the sudden "lock-down," this eye-strained individual, exhausted from nine straight hours of document coding, thought he could get away with a surreptitious game of mine-sweeper. He is in for the public scolding of a lifetime.

Like a tiger on the hunt, Anita closes in and pounces on her helpless prey.

"How dare you!"

A hundred people gather around to watch the impending slaughter. As if she were scolding an out of line school child, she tersely admonishes:

"You can't play a game. How did you get that game?"

"Brian {the tech guy}, I thought I made it clear to you that you were supposed to take everything off the systems of 'those' people."

The man, red as a tomato, and understandly mortified beyond belief, remains shaken like a leaf. The next day the man's possessions were packed away and his seat sat empty.

The Great Escape

Friday, 1/20/06:

It's 4p.m. I have been sitting at my workstation for the last nine hours. I am numb. I have been staring into a white, flourescent computer screen for the last three days from 9 o'clock in the morning until 9 o'clock at night. A sudden, intense pain shoots up my right arm indicative of early carpal tunnel. I can't bear to read another e-mail, review another spreadsheet, or code another document. There is no escape. There is no internet. There is no telephone. There is just me and the clickity-click of the coders around me.

In a sudden spat of desperation, I rise like a phoenix. I make it my mission to reach the Starbucks across the street. I quickly grab my coat and head for the door. A hundred stunned and silent eyes jealously stare me down as I skillfully weave my way past row upon row of coding terminals. One wrong move can lead to sudden unemployment. But, luckily, this time I am safe. The project manager, sealed off in her glass-encased cubicle, appears to be pre-occupied with the latest issue of the Joyce Leslie catalogue.

I have made it out. I am safe. I am a bona-fide refugee of temp land. As I quickly gulp down my steaming, hot cup of java, I am hit by a disturbing realization. How am I going to get back into templand?

The Mill

I started a new project today. You probably can't tell just by reading this but I am utterly exhausted. All I want to do is go to bed and cry. Once again, the agency lied to me. Although the physical infastructure of the project was adequate, the atmosphere was absolutely stringent. There was no telephone, internet, or any other communication allowed with the outside world. You MUST work 60-70 hours a week and you MUST arrive by 9a.m. Also, you MUST take an hour lunch and you MUST leave at 8p.m. Although you MUST work until 8p.m., there was, of course, no dinner or transportation provided. The project was an absolute mill. The idea that an attorney will be able to competently undertake document review for six hours straight after working an 11 hour day in a hellhole is utterly preposterous. The corporate clients are in no way served by such a fictitious farce. What a complete and utter waste of time and money!

Legal Sweatshop Award

Who would you nominate for legal sweatshop of the month? Who, while requiring you to bill 80 hours a week, sticks you in an airless hell-hole and cheats you out of overtime? While Tom the Temp and several front-line sources definitely have some candidates in mind, he is more than eager to receive input from his blog-reading audience. tomthetemp@hotmail.com

Random Ravings of a White Collar Day Laborer

Ah yes!! It finally arrived. After decades of socio-economic decay and third world exploitation, it is finally here! Someone came up with the bright idea of bringing that very model of third world desperation and despair right here to the modern day law firm! International Monetary Fund meet your jolly-old American counter-part Sallie Mae. Who needs a sweatshop in Cambodia when you got several right here in mid-town Manhattan?

"The use of contract and temporary attorneys grew 11 percent last year, many markets are beginning to utilize the trend, two, three, four years ago, it wasn't as common; that growth came at the expense of attorneys in the survey's 'other' category, 10,749, which includes of counsel, senior counsel and staff attorneys."

Ah yes, how the partners love them. Why bill a client $250 an hour and have to pay an associate $75 an hour when you can bill a client $250 an hour and pay a temp $25 an hour to do the same work? Last year, one particular mid-town firm shocked the legal community when its profits per partner far outpaced that of its peers. What could explain this miraculous transformation? Temps, temps, temps! Don't think the other firms didn't take notice. Everyone is now clamoring in one unified voice to bring in the temps!

{all commentors post at the pleasure of Tom the Temp}