Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Anita and the Eunuch

Yesterday was another turbulent day at work. Anita informed us that we were not allowed to leave the floor, a.k.a. our crammed workspaces, without first signing out with her. This new rule will be strictly enforced (it applies even to those taking a two minute cigarette break) and anyone caught violating it will be fired on the spot. The Eunuch, meanwhile, stood nodding in agreement with the new resolution and kindly reminded us that we were still allowed to use the bathroom. He warned us, however, not to abuse the privilege and to spend as little time in there as possible.

Confusion ensued, however, when someone asked if this new rule applied to the use of the kitchen sink. Anita and the Eunuch appeared perplexed by the unexpected inquiry and told us that they would have to get back to us with the exact parameters of what constitutes a bathroom break.


Mike said...

I thought this kind of thing went out with the Emancimation Proclaimation. :-)

Anonymous said...

Questions like that can get you fired on these projects.

Anonymous said...

Dont u guys know that a temp is worth only three-fifths of a person??

AngryBell said...

Unlike slaves, temps are not counted. They are expensed, billed for, and abused. To count them would be an acknowledgement of them as people who have a JD. (Unless of course you have the unbelieveable fortune to work at certain places where not only are you counted, but listened to. It does happen occasionally!)

Anonymous said...

We have a eunuch at our project as well. The sad thing is, he's a paralegal. He believes he is a deity. He sits in a large chair on the edge of the conference table with his feet propped on the table. Occasionally, he barks orders. We have to answer to him. It is sad.

Anonymous said...

As a co-member of your project, I am glad to hear you sharing this with the rest of the world. The only sunny side of this place is the fact that the female associate and the newbie male associate are quite pleasant and seemingly reasonable.

I still go downstairs to the deli, in blatant disregard for the signing out rule. I can get breakfast faster than I can go to the bathroom.

Anonymous said...
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Anonymous said...

from the rumor mill here is the start of

the sweatshop list:
Paul Weiss (basement, mice, falling cielings).
Sullivan (asshole associates, the "pit," although there was free food).

the humane list:
Debevoise (pay is mediocre, but human beings for project managers)
Cravath (professionals all around for the most part).

If somebody has more firms to add to either list...this would be doing all those upcoming and unemployed 2006 grads a small favor

Anonymous said...

I can definitely attest to the horrors of Paul, Weiss.

Hughes, Hubbard was my most pleasant experience to date

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Anonymous said...

I never found LSP too willing to go to bat for its temps, either.

Anonymous said...

None of the agencies will go to bat - not business savvy for them

Anonymous said...

a contract attorney is like a three fingered bangladeshi child making Nikes...completely expendable.

Anonymous said...

someone said that contract attorney work can be done by smart monkeys!!! and the witch does resemble Anita!!! hahaha!!!

Anonymous said...

document review can be done by retarded people

Anonymous said...

Naw, Compliance is the worse. Those fools don't have the good sense to get their attorneys the same pay scale that doc review attorneys hired directly by the law firm get. So far 4 me Simpson Thacher is the best, not perfect but the best. My experience at S&C was pretty good 2, but their 36th floor is a toilet.

Anonymous said...

The fact that Anita gor written up so so so many times must say something to someone with some logic. Would you not think?

Anonymous said...

Great article! Thanks.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for interesting article.

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