Wednesday, December 09, 2009

More Lexploitation



Earlier this year we told you that "Nora Moo Moo" (no, not King Kong) would be arriving in Los Angeles. Well, she has arrived and those previously nice California rates are beginning to plummet:

"Here is a Lexploitation posting on Craigslist. I know because I received the same e-mail directly from them, although they also mentioned that there will be no paid parking parking ($60/week).

On a positive note, Providus is staffing a project at 34/hr."


http://losangeles.craigslist.org/lac/lgl/1500640581.html

172 comments:

DICKHEAD OSMAN said...

Dickhead Osman. Snot Krowshitz. Nora Moo Moo. Ah, the good old days! I'm getting warm and fuzzy thinking about risking my life day after day in Lexolution's escape-proof workspace on 41st & Madison.

Anonymous said...

She's a fucking bitch and a cow.

Anonymous said...

what the with the recent hudson bait and switch?

anyone get on the recently posted job?

Anonymous said...

cab driver ripped me off for an extra dollar tip.

coffee from one of those coffee places where they act like they are doing you a favor sucked.

document review where are you?

Anonymous said...

They are the worst of the worst. The bullshit they put you through for the crappy pay and lack of benefits is unbearable. If they are the only gig you can land, you should seriously consider killing yourself.

Anonymous said...

document reviewer where are you, we've got some docs to code now.

doccy docccy reviewer where are you, we've got some docs to code now.

doc reviewer you dumbshit

DICKHEAD OSMAN said...

I'm disappointed that this blog has no fire exits I can deadbolt and block with more computers.

Anonymous said...

Who cares about this big ole cow Nora moo moo - she is just an addition to already bad news - no public option, no unemployment, massive debt - seriously I wish hundreds of thousands of people would collectively default and decalre bankruptcies - maybe the freakin' government would wake up - what has happened to the American people is shameful - most of us are slaves....and shit scared to raise our heads - is there any movement I can join - I am sick of this shit...

Anonymous said...

Dickhead is only interested in one thing. How many cheap square feet can we purchase and how many computers and wires can we shove into it.

Sonia said...

Looks like the public option has gone the way of the do-do bird. Seems like Barry and Lieberman are more interested in spending the money to blow up arab folk overseas.

Luckily, my prayers have been answered, and I might be able to jump on Medicare early. I feel really bad that you kids got screwed again. Maybe you could hitch up with a European?

DICKHEAD OSMAN said...

I resent that comment. We're not looking to purchase more square feet. We lease our cutting-edge workspaces by the square inch, not by square foot. We lease only as many square inches as necessary to stuff as many of you as we can into as little a space as possible.

Here at Lexolution, we're proud to have finally upgraded to flat-screen monitors from the big, old-fashioned ones, since that means we can now fit 1/3 more computers into our cutting-edge workspace. (We lease the computers, too. All cutting-edge Pentium 2s.)

SNOT KROWSHITZ said...

Please allow me to introduce myself: My name is Snot Krowshitz. I am the other principle of Lexolution.

I usually remain behind-the-scenes and let my colleague Dickhead act as the "face" of Lexolution - unless, of course, we're conducting a Document Review Career Seminar at a Tier 3 law school near you or interacting with the NY Fire Department, in which case I take a more visible role.

DICKHEAD OSMAN said...

Snot, I don't want to call you out in public but I'm the one who dealt with the NY Fire Department when we got busted for violations of the fire code by deadbolting and blocking all the exits in an ancient building. Give credit where it's due - I'm also the one who suggested deadbolting and blocking them in the first place, so we could fit 10 more Nigerians who bill 28 hours a day. And as we've discussed, the more Nigerians, the better, since they not only bill 28 hours a day, but they also increase our and our clients' diversity numbers and allow us to wear The Goodguy Badge.

Anonymous said...

ROFL.

SNOT KROWSHITZ said...

I'm sorry you have to be witness to this dispute between Dickhead and I, Tom the Temp blog readers, but we need to get the facts straight.

Dickhead, I deadbolted the doors, not you. I directed Not-So-Lil' Kim Powe to scour the NYC area for as many Nigerians as possible to bill 28 hours a day. We even labelled those from other African nations, like Kenya, as Nigerian, to avoid tribal-type disputes in the workplace. Unfortunately, they don't bill nearly as many hours as real Nigerians; the only marathons they care about involve running, not clicking.

Anyway, I set that up. I'll admit, you did deal with the fallout from the NYFD inspection, since I was conducting a Document Review Career Seminar at New York Law School that afternoon with Richard Matasar. (Shout out to you, Rick - keep up the good work in feeding us over-debted, non-pedigreed graduates so we can enslave them. We'll make sure Access Group keeps getting paid, don't you worry.

Anonymous said...

I hate Lex. Those bastards blacklisted me after I had the flu. I hope Krowitz and Osman catch a sever case of swine flu. They have no consideration for the safety and welfare of the people that work for them.

DICKHEAD OSMAN said...

Read the Lexolutiomn Employee Handbook. Page 14, Paragraph 3(b)(1):

"Any claims of influenza or related illnesses will be treated with a rebuttable presumption that they are false."

We've recently extended this to dead relatives as well.

Jubilee Now said...

THROW OFF YOUR CHAINS SNUGGIE PEOPLE!!!

YOU HAVE NOTHING TO LOSE BUT THE DEBT THAT ENSLAVES YOU!!

DICKHEAD OSMAN said...

^ The only way throwing off your chains will work is if all of you do it at the same time. Good luck organizing that, since you're all a bunch of weak, scared, compromised sheeple! We laugh at you all the way to the bank here at Lexolution!

Jubilee Now said...

A mass movement is nothing more than millions of individual decisions.

It's never been anything else.

Anonymous said...

Finally, some good news:

http://abovethelaw.com/2009/12/associate_bonus_watch_boies_schiller_flexner_2009.php

Nice try, SullCrom.

Cravath, you are TTT.

Anonymous said...

my ass hurts,

oh I almost forgot i've been trying to get on a hudson job

Anonymous said...

4:14 said "Read the Lexolutiomn Employee Handbook. Page 14, Paragraph 3(b)(1):

"Any claims of influenza or related illnesses will be treated with a rebuttable presumption that they are false."

IS THIS TRUE????

Anonymous said...

So I went to see this movie, The Road, I've been hearing about and I've got to admit I didn't get it.

Looked a lot like life as a document reviewer. Except the guy no longer had to pay school loans or taxes.

The health care and food options were about the same though.

Baxter Davenport III said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
SNOT KROWSHITZ said...

To be effective, thousands of indebted people must all agree and promise to stop paying their student loans, and actually do it all together. It requires unity.

There is no unity amongst temps. We know that. We promote that here at Lexolution. You're all hopelessly fragmented and will never be able to organize. You don't have the guts to, anyway - a mass default would cause thousands of individual torments, as collectors call, student loan companies sue, state bars attempt to disbar you. It takes a lot of balls, which none of you sheeple have. You're like lambs going off to slaughter, baaaaaahhhhhhhing all the way to the end.

Anonymous said...

Has anyone heard of this guy Gerald Celente who is predicting food riots, tax revolts, record high crime next year ?? I crapped in my pants reading his forecasts. He has been on Glen Beck so I am not sure how legit he is

Anonymous said...

Snot, the NY bar disbars thousands of people every year for not paying their dues. Do a westlaw appellate division search. The system will work as long as the crap schools keep pumping in the fresh meat.

Anonymous said...

whatever anyone on glenn beck says, the opposite must be true.

it is exactly as Jon Stewart said about France and military advice: oh, France thinks it's a bad idea? then it must be the right thing to do.

Anonymous said...

Did you know that Glenn Beck is on the payroll of a third party gold investment firm? No wonder he has Celente screaming that the dollar will collapse. He is a paid schill for a gold company. It's disgusting that people like Matasar or Beck have no sense of personal ethics or morality. What they are doing may or may not be illegal, but it is WRONG.

DEAN MASSA-SAR said...

That's like Matasar saying there's a problem with schools turning out indebted graduates who can't find jobs, but also acting as Dean of NYLS AND Chair of The Access Group at the same time.

All the evidence points to one conclusion: the only road to financial success is a dishonest one.

Helga said...

Snuggie People: Santa sees you when you're sleeping.

Free Trailer Tom!!

Chump Change We Can Believe In!!

Helga said...

Very interesting, this business about extending medicare to folks who are 55+ years old. The 55+ people are the last of the Hippie Generation, you know. A good number of them have been pink slipped and are jobless - after all, why pay them what they are worth when you can get some naive 30 year old to fuck up the same job for 25K a year? These older folks are PISSED OFF, especially the ones still trying to pay for their kiddies' college tuition. Giving them medicare might keep them from protesting in the street. And they KNOW how to protest in the street since they did so much of it during the Viet Nam War, and the protests were not always peaceful.

Just a thought...

Free Trailer Tom!!

Chump Change We Can Believe In!!

Anonymous said...

i hereby dub myself "master of the obvious", but doc reviewers need to not accept these types of low-wage gigs in order to raise rates. in fact, don't even respond to those type emails from agencies, and certainly don't apply or show any interest. the problem is, of course, that people have debts to pay. oh well.

Anonymous said...

The U.S. government is a master at managing discontent - they give the old Hippes just enough health insurance to shut them up, give the rest of us just enough benefits and health insurance to shut up -- WELL I AM DONE WITH SHUTTING UP. I have no health insurance and everytime I drink water from my tap I get severe cramps - I think I am developing cancer...I am going to wait the winter as my old bones can barely move and come warmer weather I am organizing rallies...

Fan of Trailer Tom said...

Gerald Celente is right -- but it doesn't take a genius to say what he's saying. 2010 will be a year of confrontational riots and demos, and 2011 even worse. The legitimacy of the US giverbment will be called into question. Snot is right when he says temps have no unity -- but he should extend that to saying American workers and even more generally Americans have little or scant unity. In Greece, France, Latvis, Argentina, they violently demonstrate in the streets -- sometimes even bring down governments. But not here in the United States of Jackasses. Christ, I could do with a bit of Trailer Tom's moonshine right now.

Trailer Tom + Sarah Palin = Winning Team for 2012.

Fan of Trailer Tom said...

Sorry, small keyboard. meant "government," not "giverbment."

Helga said...

I liked giverbment better...
What's next? We're on our last legs financially, we've sucked the fat sow and now she won't or cannot let down any more milk. I resist the idea of fear mongering regarding 2010 and beyond but I do conceed that 2010 will be worse than 2009. Lawdy, lawdy, I hate being ripped off, just like everyone else who has an honest bone in their body. I do not see any alternative but to get out there and picket. I am not an organizer but we definately need one.

Free Trailer Tom!!

Chump Change WE can Believe in!!

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Anonymous said...

7:37 PM - Really? You will have to show proof of Beck's involvement before you much such allegations.

Otherwise you are just part of James Carville Smear Machine.

DICKHEAD OSMAN said...

Great, just what you idiots need: Helga, who says you must organize a picket, but isn't an organizer herself. She's full of hot air.

Here at Lexolution, at least we act. We don't just talk about deadbolting the fire exits; we deadbolt the fire exits. We don't just wish for Nigerians to bill 28 hours a day on our projects and up our diveristy #s so we can wear The Goodguy Badge; we task Not So Lil' Kim to go out there and get us a caseroom-full of Nigerians who bill 28 hours a day and up our diversity #s so we can actually wear The Goodguy Badge.

Get back to clicking, fools.

Anonymous said...

All of you "attorneys" are fools. You hoped to get into a "profession" that is run by the most wicked of the wicked.....Priviledged WASPS and Jews...who control the so-called legal "profession" and all of america with an iron fist.

You thought that your JD's and bar admissions would let you enter their inner sanctum....the land of gold and honey.

Well, fools...you were wrong. They deny you at every turn and laugh at you.

When their incompetent president Bush almost sent us all over a cliff they concocted a P.C. bi-racial, big eared, purple lipped messianic fraud to give you all false hope in order to pacify you. But even if his intentions were good....his WASP and JEW owners will not let him bring the true communism that you all seem to desire.

The WASPS and wicked Jews that run this country and profession are the investor class and they will be god damned if they have to pay those americans who are not them a dime to do anything that a mexican, chinese, nigerian or indian can't do for a penny.

You have all been rendered useless and marked as undesirables by those who control everything. Get that through your thick wanna be attorney, wanna be commie skulls and move on with life.

Law is for the elitist, racist, classist WASP and JEW. It is not for the likes of most of you.

Deal with it.

I just tryin to keep it real my leperous lawland loser lemming lawyer wannabe fools.

SNOT KROWSHITZ said...

10:19 is right, as un-PC and nice as it sounds.

Why are you so angry with us here at Lexolution? We're peons to them, too! We're just one step from the gutter you clickers are in.

Now, enough bonding. Get back to clicking, jerks!

Anonymous said...

10:19 is very accurate, although that's not entirely it. Law is a close-guilded system that needs connections and a network to break into, like many other professions but this one takes it to absurd extremes. It just so happens the WASP and JEW networks are the best, JEWS always take care of their own.

For minorities, a lot of minorities won't help other minorities and there aren't exactly a lot that have broken into the field anyway. So it's essentially every man for himself, and that's no way to get anything done in a sophisticated market, and it's not really all that great otherwise either.

The media controls the mentality of the general public, and the general public will always accept things that aren't to their benefit as long as they see someone else as a victim in it, or something they can latch onto to feel smarter than somebody else.

The general public is powerful if it united, but it never will. People are just really stupid. Being an attorney is a strange position to be in because you're not necessarily smarter than the average person, but you're in a spot that you have to actually consider the situation you're in.

It's all the same though, it's all a struggle to somehow get through life. The media just tells you who the enemies are and you follow that, but in reality you're in competition with someone at all times to varying degrees. As an attorney you're just in more competition than you thought you were going to be in.

Helga said...

Where did these new folks come from all of a sudden? Thanks for stopping by, guys. Good commentary, especialy 9:09, 10:19, and 1:44.

Helga said...

PS - you assholes at Lexpolution may think that you are peons just like the rest of us, but you are taking food off our tables and laughing up your snot encrusted sleeves all the way to the bank. We'll let you join the ranks of the peons when you offer us a decent place to work and a fair deal. Until then, you are Lexpolution Assholes. PS - thanks for the jobs, you mother fuckers.

DICKHEAD OSMAN said...

6:27 am? What are you doing up so early, Helga? Are you formulating another day of advice to the Clown Brigades to picket, even though you're not an organizer yourself?

We here at Lexolution provide a first-rate, secure facility for you to work in, so secure that the fire exits are deadbolted. We figured since you're all about on the same IQ level as cockroaches, the Raid Roach Motel slogan would apply: "Clickers check in, but they won't (can't) check out."

You'll feel like an extra in Amistad by how packed in you are with Nigerians billing 28 hours a day. Being in the movies is fun and glamorous. You should shut up and enjoy the experience instead of complaining.

No, get back to clicking, you cow!

SNOT KROWSHITZ said...

Dickhead, is this Helga character on one of our projects? I thought you made our projects "no internet zones"? And don't tell me she's getting online via her Iphone - you were supposed to jam cellphone signals like the Iranians, so none of these Jamaican queens could blabber on with their friends in that bastardized English-esque language they speak.

Oh well, I guess that's the tradeoff we had to make to up our diveristy #s while still hiring as few American Blacks as possible. I must admit, I like how I look when wearing The Goodguy Badge.......

Anonymous said...

Snot Krowshitz: Do these scumbag serfs of yours get any lunch breaks, toilet breaks, or do they just keep clicking away? Also, when they start nodding off, how do you, er, wake them up? A cattle prod, a taser maybe? Congratulations on running such a tight (and profitable) ship, and may the money keep rolling into your account, you smart Jew. :-)

SNOT KROWSHITZ said...

8:47, that's a very good question.

The key thing to remember when keeping clickers awake and clicking is to leave no bruises.

With this in mind, Dickhead and I began taking ju jiutsu classes to learn the proper way to do pressure point pinches. Unfortunately, Dickhead pinched the wrong fat Jamaican lady (no, not Sandrene from DeNovo), and we got in big trouble, worse than the deadbolt fire door thing.

So we had to sit down and brainstorm. What to do? Have Nora Moo Moo sit on them? No - could press them to death too quickly. Pour cold water on them? Nope - electrocution risks too high, especially since none of that shit in the workspace is grounded properly.

Then we decided on Lexolution's current policy: make the clickers as physically uncomfortable as possible. No leg room, even for a 5 foot woman. Drastically alter temperatures, so it's freezing cold one second, then there's no air circulation at all (after 6, of course.) Pack 120 people in a space that wouldn't hold 40 comfortably.And on the psychological warfare front, send Not So Lil' Kim on a mission to find the biggest nutjobs out there, so everyone's in a constant state of interpersonal tension.

Does that answer your question?

Anonymous said...

Mostly sir, but you didn't answer the part about toilet and lunch breaks. Carpet and sporting goods factoties in Pakistan employing child labor could learn a fair bit from your practices and once again I can but express my admiration for your sweatshop conditions and extorting every last click from these deadbeat slaves. Slave-operated galleys in the Roman empire were probably not as efficient.

Anonymous said...

People here complaining about Beck because he dares question Obama the Great. What has he done great? Nothing he sucks. But he's black so we have to say how great he is. It's verbal affirmative action.

Ebony has a cover story of the most influential blacks (50 people). The cover is Obama and says "Because he's our visionary." Visionary! This man hasn't had one good idea.

DICKHEAD OSMAN said...

^ The only way throwing off your chains will work is if all of you do it at the same time. Good luck organizing that, since you're all a bunch of weak, scared, compromised sheeple! We laugh at you all the way to the bank here at Lexolution!

Anonymous said...

Obama isn't a terrible president. He's just like the rest, there's not much you can do in this situation at all. American politics is very inefficient and is controlled by corporate America. The mess we have now was caused by war spending which was done primarily also for corporate America, at the expense of the rest of the country.

You can go back to the Lochner court, it's been like this for a very long time. Every civilization has a rise, a golden age, a decline and then an outright collapse. Why does everybody think that our current civilization is totally immune from that historical truth? The country probably won't go the way of the Roman Empire, but the British, Spanish and French empires were quite vast at one time and look at them now. It happens. We will end up like Britain.

Anonymous said...

Obama is what Malcolm X would have called a "house nigger." He's hired to do a certain job -- which is to take care of the interests of the financial elite. It's difficult to criticise this house nigger because one is reflexively called a "racist." This monkey isn;t even a good orator -- it's the same hackneyed cliches repeated again and again. Once this house nigger gets booted out (at the end of his first term), some other bum will take his place. And that's American "democracy." As Dickhead says, you have to rise and throw off your chains together. But you being Americans -- i.e., a snivelling, back-stabbing, craven, untrustworthy lot, it just ain't gonna happen.

DICKHEAD OSMAN said...

As a follow-up to Snot's comments:

It was Snot who wanted to take the jiu jitsu classes, not me. I wanted to watch old episodes of Star Trek to study Mr. Spock's Vulcan Death Pinch, but Snot insisted the Vulcan Death Pinch wasn't real, and if it were, it would be too risky for us to use. After all, a dead clicker doesn't make us any $$$$. Although we placed a dead cadaver who was a lawyer when he was alive on a project once. He lasted 4 months and even was put on the priv team. I don't know where Not So Lil' Kim dug him up (no pun intended), but he paid for my vacation to St. Lucia that winter. He was dead, after all. Nowhere to deposit his paycheck, except in the Lexolution account......

Anonymous said...

Hi, Emily!

Anonymous said...

The dead cadaver just shuffled through my project and moved on to a higher level review. It is a hot commodity. It bills a ton of hours and doesn't complain.

Nora Moo Moo said...

Can we please! I leave town and you little bitches are already fighting. If you want mama to bring home the bacon, you are going to have to control yourselves.

The good news is there are a lot of hungry JD's here. The back door to Loyola and Southwestern are a gold mine. Ca-ching! Ca-ching! Not too many Nigerians out here, but I have set up a meeting with Gloria Aldrich and her friends on the Cali bar to possibly get illegal mexicans barred. Cross your fingers.

SNOT KROWSHITZ said...

Nora, we didn't send you out there with such a long leash. Dickhead and I are still in charge, so be mindful of the insuborninate commentary, or we'll summon you back from LaLa Land and back to bleak NYC.

To answer an earlier question, according to OSHA , with which we've also deveopled a close relationship, we can't ban bathroom breaks altogether, for human rights and public health reasons. However, we are well within our rights to gently discourage bathroom breaks.

To this end, we make sure to keep the restrooms as filthy as possible, generally having them gently hosed down every Friday afternoon to show we care. We bought scabies on the black market, which we had the Mexican janitor sprinkle all over the toilet seat to discourage sitting down. I say 'toilet seat' because we made sure both the men's and women's rooms were one-man-cans. This achieved the dual objective of discouraging bathroom breaks and making the clickers as uncomfortable as possible. There is nothing more uncomfortable than having to take a crap, but being unable or afraid to because of both filth and 100 other clickers needing to poop, too.

I hope this answers the second prong of your question.

Anonymous said...

Yes it does, and I'm speechless with admiration. You've taken the art of inhumane work conditions to a whole new plateau, and exhibit a consummate mastery rarely seen in history. The Marquis de Sade did not have such a honed sense on how to inflict misery.

Nora Moo Moo said...

Screw you, Snot. I will have Daddy pull the Hogan account.

Anonymous said...

By the way, is that a picture of Obama on the original post to which we're all commenting?

Anonymous said...

That is going to be Barry's expression when he loses the House next year.

Anonymous said...

Poor Obama. That poor poor black fucker. If he had known how much hate he would inspire from low-level whites, trailer trash and crackers - I'm sure he would not have run. I am not black but I am amazed at how much hatred people can feel for someone just because of their skin color. After all he is not a rapist or murderer or even pickpocket - he is a highly intelligent guy with solid credentials. I guess low level whites feel so much self-hatred because they are ultimately losers in THEIR OWN SYSTEM but they can always look to minorities and think well at least I am better than them. But when minorities turn out to be far more hard-working and intelligent than them they have no one to look down on and have to come to terms with their low level. They cannot handle that so they try to push the minorities back down. Psych 101.

Anonymous said...

Dunno. This is veering from the topic of the thread but this is an expose of the mocha messiah by Larry Flynt three years ago, which is bang on target:

http://www.larryflynt.com/mycms/index.php?mact=News,cntnt01,detail,0&cntnt01articleid=21&cntnt01returnid=15

Also keep in mind that this baboon has been working for mysterious vested interests since he left college. The problem is not so much his black skin but that's used his black skin to con a bunch of people into voting for him, thinking he's a progressive. He's not. He's a reactionary and an errand boy of the same financial elite that is happily f****ing the rest of the country.

Anonymous said...

If the link above doesn't work, try this one:

http://larryflynt.com/?p=36

DICKHEAD OSMAN said...

That may very well be true about Indian women - I wouldn't know because I'm as gay as Mama Mia the ABBA musical - but what does it have to do with Lexolution and politics?

We here at Lexolution are fully aware that there's no such thing as a political process in the USA. The financial elites control everything and buy both politcal parties equally. Then both political parties play Good Cop, Bad Cop on the various issues, while in reality, the Monied Folk always get what they want.

Wake up, clickers. No politician is going to save you. They all dance for the same masters.

SNOT KROWSHITZ said...

Seriosly - all men in Human Resources are as queer as one can possibly be, while the women are all Type A, strap-on wearing fascist she-men.

Can someone explain this dynamic to me?

SNOT KROWSHITZ said...

Oh, and PS: kiss my ass, Nora, you fat f*ckette!

When you come back to NYC - soon, because Debbie Dull is getting tired of your flapping mouth, too - we're going to make you sit on the scabies toilet for a while, so they crawl all up into your Grand Canyon cameltoe and build a colony. Maybe you'll break the commode in half, too, with your fleshy girth. Sorry, clickers - toilet's broken. No poopoo for you..

Tell Daddy to shove the Hogan account up his ass!!

Anonymous said...

I am sorry to report a rumour that Trailer Tom was raped in jail today by a big biiiatch of the Aryan Brotherhood. Rumour has it that the rapist was a henchman of Sarah Palim. Before he left for jail Trailer did say that Sarah Palin will fuck other poor people up the ass as well. There is no more news - we are all awaiting word from Trailer.

Helga said...

Work, mother fuckers. I get up early because I have to go to work. I don't expect you low life scum trolls at Lexpolution to understand this concept because none of you ever worked a day in your sorry lives. However, I must admit that you are very, very funny. In fact, the commentary over the last few days has been very, very funny. The best ever. If you don't succeed in frightening all the youngsters away, we might have something here. In the meantime, how do you like your picket signs? Shaken, stirred, or shoved up your massive asses?

Free Trailer Tom!!!

Chump Change we Can Believe In!!

Helga said...

PS - Snot, I'd rather move to West Virginia and eat raw bear meat than work for your two-bit excuse for a company.

SNOT KROWSHITZ said...

Wow, what a putdown by Clicker Helga! What would you do in West Virgina to pay the bills? There's no clickin' going on down there. You might be forced to actually work. Or collect some of that old fart senile Senator Robert Byrd's handouts.

But I'm glad you're a fan. Where's our fanclub? This Trailer Tom character has one. What's he done that we haven't surpassed in a mere 36 hours of blogging? Dickhead and I may be evil, but we're also geniuses. Evil geniuses. At business. At humor. At making clickers feel uncomfortable in every way a clicker can be made to feel uncomfortable.

But the clicking continues. And the lines to click are out the door, swelled with not only the permatemps who were always banging on our door, but also laid-off staff attorneys and associates in ever-increasing #s, who are keeping the permatemps out.

Simple supply and demand: there's a glut of you, and one of us. We're billing you out at the same rate we always did. You're now making $5-$15 less an hour, with no reimbursements or cars.

Net result: I take a vacation next month in the Caribbean, where half my labor force is from.

It's brilliant!

(evil laughter)

MUHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAAAAA!!!!!

Helga said...

Pay my bills in West Virginia? Nobody pays their bills in West Virginia. They manufacture moonshine, shoot meat, grow vegetables, and smoke weed. It is friggin paradise compared to your operation, which is a dangerous, nasty, smelly, sickening, gawd awful mess. When are you gonna wake up and smell the B.O.?

DICKHEAD OSMAN said...

Snot, I think Helga has a crush on you. Should I become her gay boyfriend and find out?

Jubilee Now said...

Worth saying again:

THROW OFF YOUR CHAINS SNUGGIE PEOPLE!!!

YOU HAVE NOTHING TO LOSE BUT THE DEBT THAT ENSLAVES YOU!!

SNOT KROWSHITZ said...

Please, Dickhead, don't do me any favors. I don't date the slave help. Who do I look like, Thomas Jefferson? And anyway, I'm married. You were there, remember?

Oh, but I forgot: you were drunk, under the table, and busy performing fellatio on your then-boyfriend Sebastian, whom you renamed "Sebastard" after you broke up. (The rest of us here at Lexolution really got sick of hearing that damn name!! Sebastard-this, Sebastard-that. God damn....)

Helga said...

Dickhead, you moron - if verbal abuse equals "a crush", then you are more stupid than I originally thought. But damn, you and Snot are cute!!

Sonia - wanna play catch?

Helga said...

Snuggie People: Santa knows if you've been bad or good !!!!!

Free Trailer Tom!

Chump Change We Can Believe In!!!

Anonymous said...

Regarding Snuggies, today I put my coat back to front as I watched TV. Why buy a snuggie - your coat is already a snuggie if wear it the right way.

Regarding Lexpollution I would urge them to hire hotter babes - the ones in NYC have moustaches and fried hair. Not very professional.

DICKHEAD OSMAN said...

They look like that because I don't want any of
Those bitches to look better than me!

Anonymous said...

It's hard to look good at 15$/hr.

The entire executive suite at Lex should be hung in effigy, or otherwise.

Anonymous said...

Oh these fakes are so funny! I forgot to laugh.
Dick Osman, Snot Krowshitz, Helga they are a laugh a minute.
And who can forget the great wit of "Dave" with his endless bopping intern jokes.

Please remind me to laugh and why all these fakees don't deserve to be deleted.



ha ha ha

Helga said...

11:01 The Trolls of which you speak (and I am not one of them - I have been making an ass of myself on this Board for at least several months now) are entertaining and perhaps their Creator is, well, maybe slightly talented?

Nahhhhh -

Bring in on Peeps! Where is Trailer Tom?? Baby, I'm 73 years old but its not too late! I will produce you a son who can carry on in your Trailer Tom Tradition.

Fan of Trailer Tom said...

Trailer Tom is sui generis. Dickhead and Snot pale into insignifiocance in comparison.

Trailer Tom + Sarah Palin = Winning Team for 2012.

Anonymous said...

Oh Helga you are so funny. Such a great wit, you cannot find anywhere. Helga with the blonde picture.... now that is comic genius.

SNOT KROWSHITZ said...

Hey 11:01, at least we're inventive enough to come up with a handle to post under, instead of bland, vanilla "Anonymous." And this is my real name: SNOT KROWSHITZ.

You're a loser. Get back to clicking. Or filing your unemployment claim. Whichever it is, get back to it.

Anonymous said...

I think all of these fakes were invented by that lame "temporarily yours" blogger chick.

The endless stream of unimaginative gibberish serves no purpose but to bury any legit comments.

These are retarded, fake, poorly conceived failures and the product of an extremely bored out of work moron.

Take your fetid doggy doo somewhere else, anywhere else.

It is just so pathetic and boring.

I think you believe that this will get you some kind of gig. But you're wrong, it will only serve to show how utterly talentless you are.

Go back to writing your piece of shit blog and leave this blog for people that actually work in this industry.

Buh bye! You really suck.

Anonymous said...

These have been the comments ever. My wife asked me what I was laughing so hard at.

DICKHEAD OSMAN said...

Nice conniption, 9:54. Apparently, you don't appreciate what's hidden in the humor. You are a humorless individual. We'd love to have you on one of our projects, since you'd obviously play the role of 'disgruntled, oversensitive person' perfectly, and thus make the other clickers angry and uncomfortable.

Email Not So Lil' Kim with the subject "Disgruntled & Oversensitive Available For Temporary Placement." She'll know what to do next.

Anonymous said...

No, you are an idiot and this is the place where actual attorneys exchange information.

There is no need for your retarded blather. It's for you to STFU with all of this incredibly mindless blather and take it back your piece of shit blog.

You absolutely suck. No one needs to read 100+ messages from the shut-in.

You have nothing to say or offer the group.

Blogs are good for the comments of actual people.

You are completely irresponsible and stupid. Take this garbage elsewhere.

Nora Moo Moo said...

I'll be back later. I'm going for my Brazilian.

Anonymous said...

Snot Krowshitz...... wow, that is hilarious. ha ha ha. I'm dying from laughter.

You're almost as funny as Helga and David, two of the great wits ever.

(The worst thing about these fakees is that they are so repetitive.......... webmaster please get on the case and start deleting them!)

DICKHEAD OSMAN said...

This is the perfect time to quote one of my idols and heroines in life, Christina Aguilera:

"I am beautiful,
No matter what you say,
Your words can't bring me down."

What blog are you expecting us to go back to? We don't have a blog because we're too busy running a multi-million dollar business. This is our blogging opportunity, thank you. And the people, they are laughing. Now you STFU.

Anonymous said...

9:54. Listen Mr. Prissy - don't get your Walmart knickers in a knot. If Tom wants he can delete whatever comments he wants. Who are you? Are you Tom?

Anonymous said...

Maybe this guy is upset that the Blog did not make it to the best ABA category this year. Maybe he wants it to become more serious this year so it can make it next year??? Why are you so upset if you are not the owner of this blog - the owner can do what he wants.

Nora Moo Moo said...

Snot, get outta here and transfer some funds into my travel account. Mama needs to visit home and the airline is forcing me to spread my butt cheeks over two seats.

Anonymous said...

Work in the glamorous Upper East Side!! big $!!
Carpentry help needed - for about 6 hours of work on Monday, December 14th, 2009

Job duties- the taking apart of fine wood bookshelves and built-in blinds for about 6 hours

Will pay cash - $14/hr

Must have own hand tools and drill

Please respond to info@greensawdesign.com ASAP

Anonymous said...

America - change you can believe in!! Elegant warehouse work!!
Part-time warehouse position needed for busy retail store. Duties include receiving, fulfilling internet orders, and organizing the warehouse. Experience preferred, but will train if necessary. Competitive hourly wage and excellent work schedule. Hiring asap. Qualified candidates, please reply to this ad, and include your contact information.

Pay $15/hour

Anonymous said...

$12/hour to start!! thanks Obama!!!
Looking for one full time housekeeper mornings and weekends needed. You will be assisting with court maintenance during the week and locker room attendant on weekends. Benefits are included.
Looking for one housekeeper full time for high-end health club. We need evenings and weekends. Benefits are included.

Pay $12/hour for start

Anonymous said...

Delivery driver!! i went to law school for this?? oh well it was a 3rd tier.....
A fast growing Company located in Woodside, Queens. Need one delivery driver, It is better if you know some dishwasher machine simple repairing. You must have a driving clean record.

Also need one person to check the dishwashers on the customer side, and place the orders for the customers. If you know how to repair machine is big plus.

If you can speak chinese, which is big plus, not must. You must be self-motivated, work independly, responsible. At the begining we can train our employees.

We have a friendly working enviroment, treat our employees respectfully. Look for individuals that want to stay long term and want to grow in the company.


Please send your resume and references to: rogerliny@yahoo.com




Location: Queens Woodside
Compensation: Payrate is around $10.00 - $11.00 per hour based up experience.

SNOT KROWSHITZ said...

These hourly wage rates compare favorably to what's in store for plummeting clicker rates in 2010. You thought 2009 was bad for you dumdums? Just wait.

Of course, we'll still bill you out at the same rate as always. The only difference is you make less and I make more.

America - what a country!

Anonymous said...

Document Review Attorneys - Newark (Midtown)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Date: 2009-12-11, 1:20PM EST
Reply to: job-thy5m-1505484271@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hey, Snot. Looks like you are getting with the Newark ghetto.

"Lexolution's client has an immediate need for admitted attorneys to review contracts in Newark NJ. Project will start 12/16 and run for about 1 month. Easy walk from Newark Penn Station. Apply now with your resume. Great working environment and competitive hourly rate."

SNOT KROWSHITZ said...

You got it, punk - Newark Ghetto here we come, and at bargain basement clicker rates! I love this business!

Please be aware that Monday is National Dean Massa-sar Appreciation Day, where we here at Lexolution, as well as everyone at those other legal temp agencies we compete with, give thanks and praise to Dean Richard Massa-sar (or Chairman Richard Massa-sar, or, more accurately, Deanman Richard Massa-sar), for keeping our furnaces burning with over-leveraged Tier 3 law school grads who have been shut out of real legal jobs, but who still need to pay Access Group every month, on pain of eternal earthy torment and beyond.

VIVA DEANMAN MASSA-SAR!!

Stupid Sexy Flanders said...

I've got to say, this blog definitely does not deserve to be in the voting for "Best Blog." All the fake characters going back and forth are annoying, and I can't quite decide whether the fake characters are more annoying than the racist rants they've temporarily supplanted, or maybe they're equally annoying.

Either way, onto real news:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/34382858/ns/politics-capitol_hill/

The Defense Appropriations Bill needs to be voted on by December 18th. Because there is that deadline, jobless benefits extension has been attached to the bill so that the extension can come in before January.

Slick move!! And it will also grab bipartisan votes because the defense funding is bipartisan. There is hope for those of you with benefit tier ending soon.

Happy Holidays and have a fun New Year's!!

Anonymous said...

Thank you Stupid Sexy Flanders. Again you are not stupid at all and very sexy. I love you.

DEANMAN MASSA-SAR said...

Thank you so much, Snot.

I just want to inform all Tom the Temp readers that Access Group has just completed a study that showed "Death Clauses" in student loan contracts weren't totally effective in creating eternal chains of bondage for hapless student loan debtors and their families.

(For those uninformed among you, a Death Clause is the clause in your private student loan contract that states you're in default if you're irresponsible and die.)

Apparently, crafty estate attorneys were, in a few cases, able to convince a court to negate these clauses and win freedom for the debtor's estate. This is unacceptable.

So, Access Group has begun to hire psychic mediums to locate the reincarnations of former debtors, in order to pin the amount owed, with interest, service fees, and the psychic's fees, onto the reincarnated debtors.

Reincarnation Law is the hottest new area of law, and NYLS will be offering an LL.M. program in it, starting in 2010. The Federal Courts seem to be in agreement that responsibility for a student loan debt attaches in subsequent lifetimes, and student loan companies are within their rights to seek out the reincarnations of debtors to demand payment.

As of this writing, Access Group's psychic mediums have located almost 200 reincarnated debtors; we've successfully garnished the lunch money of a several who are currently elementary school students, and we seized the college fund of a 13 month old in Florida. (I was against this, believing we should wait for the kid to be closer to college age, so there would be more money in the account.)

Have a nice weekend, and don't forget my big day on Monday!

Anonymous said...

Hey Flanders, I like the humorous characters. I think they're really funny and hitting the nail on the head, and they've brightened my last few days.

There's enough room on here for both you and the funny characters. If you don't like what they have to say, skip over their posts.

Why do people insist that they must censor others' self-expression in order to validate their own?

Flanders can post, Dickhead and Snot can post, everyone can post. That's the fun of this, right?

Helga said...

WTF?!? Where is Rory the Retard? I'm worried about the little booger. Pops in jail, Mama under the managing partner's desk every night - who is taking care of Rory?


Free Trailer Tom!!
Chump Change We Can Believe In!!

Helga said...

Attorneys exchanging information here? More like attorneys bitching and moaning here. Not that they don't have anything to bitch and moan about, and I am completely sympathetic. And if you read carefully, you will see not only humor but also some good, semi-radical social commentary.

I, for one, get lots of good intel here about the industry. Nothing is censored here, which is precious and unique. If you are unhappy with the content, there are many other blawgs out there to visit. Ofcourse, if the host doesn't like what you have to say, they will erase your post.

Free Trailer Tom!!

Chump Change We Can Believe In!!

Sonia said...

What is like out there? Any new projects starting soon?

Anonymous said...

amy kossoris is by far the worst though. she is the rudest, ugliest and most unprofessional "recruiter" out there!

Anonymous said...

I am a top tier grad with little debt - frankly I have little to bitch about. I come here for the humor and candid info. on agencies and projects. Not so interested in constant bitching and moaning about TTT - whether you end up at first tier or TTT it's all in your hands at some point. Hard work, initiative is always needed.
The funny characters don't bother me - in fact they add some color to the same old whinings by losers...and to the guy who said this is a place for "actual attorneys to exchange information". Really?

Anonymous said...

I thought "actual attorneys" were going to court, meeting clients, networking and not clicking and sitting around moaning on a website.

Anonymous said...

Tom you really ought to do something. The whole last string of 40 "comments" is the same old fakees.

Do you realize how un-funny David, Helga, Sonia are?

It must be the same person posting all of them, because no one could have such a dumb sense of humor.

Anonymous said...

Oh my god Helga, David, Sonia, Dick, Snot K., you are sooooooooooooooooooooooooooo funny!

I am just dying from laughter.

Look at Helga's lines (repeated probably 100 times already):
Free Trailer Tom!!

Chump Change We Can Believe In!!



Wow such wit.
Soooooooooo funny.










ha ha ha.



ha ha ha.



Dat so funny.

Anonymous said...

Not fair - Helga also advises the snuggie people to wake up.

They should; therefore, Helga serves an important purpose.

Keep it up Helga!

DICKHEAD OSMAN said...

Helga is a bore, but Snot, Massa-sar, and I are funny. Just admit it and stop being a cranky pain in the ass.

PS: I'm taking a moment away from the joys of Hannukah to write this.

Anonymous said...

Yes it takes Dick Osman, another unfunny fakee, to assert how funny the other fakees are.

I have never laughed at any of them. They aren't funny. Period.

Tom is funny his labels and pictures are really witty, like the King Kong one for Nora Moo Moo. But you fakees just bite the big one.

You are repetitive and very unfunny.
David, how many hundreds of times has he made a bopping interns joke. Was it original and creative the first time? What about the 100time?

Anonymous said...

David we need several hundred more bopping intern jokes (the Tiger Woods one was a sidesplitter, such comic originality!), and Helga more Norwegian blonde stereotyping. I need my daily dose of your seering wit and genius.

Anonymous said...

Who is the least unfunny of the choices below:


1) Trailer Tom
2) Sarah Pailin fakee
3) Helga
4) Sonia
5) Recruiter
6) Better Temp
7) Dick O.
8) Snot K.
9) Deanman M.
10) Fan of Trailer Tom
11) None of the above
12) All of the above because it is the same person.

Helga said...

Hey - at least you aren't being harrassed by BETTER CODER!!!!!

Helga said...

PS - I am NOT the same person as the rest of these freaks. I only appear here as the Helga charachter.

Helga said...

OMG, my ego is crushed!! I may never click again!! I, Helga, unfunny? I have made it my life's most important mission to make you assholes laugh. And now to learn that I am a failure?!?

I may have to go back to school and get an LLM after this! How can I look at myself in the mirror each day - knowing that I am "unfunny"?

Sonia said...

How dare you group me in with those ruffians. My language is more dignified than vile that comes out of some of your mouths. Back in the day, my mother would scrub my mouth out with ivory soap, if I said half the things some of you say.

Anonymous said...

12) - The board spamming is from that retarded person with the failed blog which nobody reads. So now she has to spam a board with actual visitors to get an audience.

This deranged person is stupid, unfunny and psychotic. It's the same moronic blather over and over and over again.

The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over, expecting a different result. Well, these fakees were NEVER FUNNY and NEVER WILL BE FUNNY.

It is some of the worst crap EVER on the Internet.

BORING, STUPID, RETARDED AND NOT FUNNY!

Helga said...

Sonia - you are the bees' knees!!

Helga said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Mork said...

Helga, try NYLS's Reincarnation Law LL.M. program next Fall. Be part of the family, the Overleveraged Family.

Shut your trap, 10:38 - these last few days have been the funniest in recent history on this blog. These posters (or poster) are really cutting to the quick on a few topics, and doing it with biting sarcasm and humor. They might be pros.

You're just jealous and miserable. You would be fantastic for a Lex project - Dick was right.

DICKHEAD OSMAN said...

LISTEN, JERKS:

My name is DICKHEAD, not DICK. Don't unnecessarily shorten my name.

I don't have a blog, nor does Snot. We run a multi-milllion dollar legal temp agency called Lexolution. Maybe you've heard of us? Maybe you've worked for us? We are your overlords. We don't have time to run a blog, so that's why we come here. Shut up or I'll find you if you're on one of our projects and have you teabagged.

You are puny compared to us. Puny, puny, puny!!

Anonymous said...

10:49 - Umm, we know it's you again. It's your 120th post out of 131.

You really are a psychotic spammer. Not to mention not funny, not interesting and stupid.

Anonymous said...

Snot and Dickhead are evil kapo like overlords that exploit heavily indebted leveraged graduates in horrible crowded poorly ventilated document review mills that have been cited by the fire department for being unsafe. Half the paychecks of the poor souls that work in these mills goes back to pad the lavish lifestyles of assholes like Dick Massa-sar and his ilk.

Anonymous said...

"My name is DICKHEAD, not DICK. Don't unnecessarily shorten my name."


Wow, that is soooooo funny.



ha ha ha.


Helga three in a row.

ha ha ha.

soooooooooooooo funny.



Sonia "Back in the day, my mother would scrub my mouth out with ivory soap, if I said half the things some of you say."


so witty
such a comic wit


ha ha ha.

Anonymous said...

The fakees are spams from the same person.

No one could be so unfunny and repetitive.

They all sound the same.

If a joke is obvious and as old as the hills, it will show up under Helga, Sonia, David.

"Trailer Tom" golly that is such wit.

Anonymous said...

I have to agree that the fakees on this website is the most tedious and unfunny material on the whole internet.

SNOT KROWSHITZ said...

INSANITY is going to a $40,000/yr 3rd Tier law school, paying for it with full student loans, thinking you'll get a real legal job that pays enough to service your debt, then being forced to review documents for $30/hr for the foreseeable future, 10:38 - when you're not collecting unemployment.

INSANITY isn't pointing out the B.S. that's going on in the legal education, student loan, and temp agency areas, and using biting humor and sarcasm to illustrate it.

If you have something better to contribute, then contribute it. You're the one who's boring, repetitve and unfunny. not Dickhead, Massa-sar, and myself.

But keep up the criticism - any attention is good attention in SHOW BIZ. Maybe you idiots are finally getting the message:

YOU'RE BEING TAKEN ADVANTAGE OF!

Can anything motivate you to action, or are you going to continue like cows to slaughter? (Don't let Nora Moo Moo hear me say that...)

Obviously I want to keep taking advantage of you, but it's getting boring for me, not even a challenge. So I'm trying to arm you and make you more sporting competition. Arm you with information. But you seem to prefer stupidity. Interesting dynamic.

Anonymous said...

Dick O says "Shut up or I'll find you if you're on one of our projects and have you teabagged."


ha ha ha.

soooooooo hilarious,

Anonymous said...

11:15 - if you had the patience to read through tedious material, you'd actually be a lawyer instead of a document reviewer.

Anonymous said...

11:16, why don't you tell a joke and see how it flies?

Anonymous said...

Snot K., another sock puppet of the same person, once again touting how clever he is. No one else thinks so. Just the same person who is retarded.

Anonymous said...

11:17 - doc review is tedious, idiot.

SNOT KROWSHITZ said...

11:19, here I am again. Get mad.

Anonymous said...

11:16, why don't you tell a joke and see how it flies?


Is this a comedy website?
I think I've contributed some useful tips and info, no thanks to your constant flood of garbage.

Saying the same unfunny joke literally hundreds of times on this site.......how boring can you get.

Anonymous said...

"SNOT KROWSHITZ said...
11:19, here I am again. Get mad."


Not mad, stupid spammer.

It is fun for me to keep pointing out how unfunny you are.

hey did you hear the one about David, bopping interns? Tiger Woods is taking the heat off him for a while..........maybe he'll bop Sonia and Helga in a twosome.

ha ha ha.

Anonymous said...

Wow - thanks for the Anonymous advice posts. I'm trying to find them, but no luck.

Why would anyone listen to your advice, anyway? You're obviously not in much of a position to be offering any.

Click on!

Anonymous said...

Get it? Snot Crow - shit(s)!!Get it? Snot Crow - shit(s)!!Get it? Snot Crow - shit(s)!!Get it? Snot Crow - shit(s)!!Get it? Snot Crow - shit(s)!!Get it? Snot Crow - shit(s)!!Get it? Snot Crow - shit(s)!!Get it? Snot Crow - shit(s)!!Get it? Snot Crow - shit(s)!!Get it? Snot Crow - shit(s)!!Get it? Snot Crow - shit(s)!!Get it? Snot Crow - shit(s)!!Get it? Snot Crow - shit(s)!!Get it? Snot Crow - shit(s)!!Get it? Snot Crow - shit(s)!!Get it? Snot Crow - shit(s)!!Get it? Snot Crow - shit(s)!!Get it? Snot Crow - shit(s)!!Get it? Snot Crow - shit(s)!!Get it? Snot Crow - shit(s)!!

Anonymous said...

"Anonymous said...
Wow - thanks for the Anonymous advice posts. I'm trying to find them, but no luck."


Duh.

Anonymous said...

^^ ??? What's your point? On many levels?

Anonymous said...

Helga
Sonia wash mouth soap
David bop intern Tiger Woods
Trailer Tom....free him
Dick O.
Snot K.
Sarah Pailin (ha ha ha)
Helga
Sonia wash mouth soap
David bop intern Tiger Woods
Trailer Tom....free him
Dick O.
Snot K.
Sarah Pailin (ha ha ha)
Helga
Sonia wash mouth soap
David bop intern Tiger Woods
Trailer Tom....free him
Dick O.
Snot K.
Sarah Pailin (ha ha ha)
Helga
Sonia wash mouth soap
David bop intern Tiger Woods
Trailer Tom....free him
Dick O.
Snot K.
Sarah Pailin (ha ha ha)
Helga
Sonia wash mouth soap
David bop intern Tiger Woods
Trailer Tom....free him
Dick O.
Snot K.
Sarah Pailin (ha ha ha)
Helga
Sonia wash mouth soap
David bop intern Tiger Woods
Trailer Tom....free him
Dick O.
Snot K.
Sarah Pailin (ha ha ha)
Helga
Sonia wash mouth soap
David bop intern Tiger Woods
Trailer Tom....free him
Dick O.
Snot K.
Sarah Pailin (ha ha ha)
Helga
Sonia wash mouth soap
David bop intern Tiger Woods
Trailer Tom....free him
Dick O.
Snot K.
Sarah Pailin (ha ha ha)
Helga
Sonia wash mouth soap
David bop intern Tiger Woods
Trailer Tom....free him
Dick O.
Snot K.
Sarah Pailin (ha ha ha)
Helga
Sonia wash mouth soap
David bop intern Tiger Woods
Trailer Tom....free him
Dick O.
Snot K.
Sarah Pailin (ha ha ha)
Helga
Sonia wash mouth soap
David bop intern Tiger Woods
Trailer Tom....free him
Dick O.
Snot K.
Sarah Pailin (ha ha ha)
Helga
Sonia wash mouth soap
David bop intern Tiger Woods
Trailer Tom....free him
Dick O.
Snot K.
Sarah Pailin (ha ha ha)
Helga
Sonia wash mouth soap
David bop intern Tiger Woods
Trailer Tom....free him
Dick O.
Snot K.
Sarah Pailin (ha ha ha)

Anonymous said...

Can't we do anything to shut Lexolution down?

I am all for being professional and doing the whole Ghandi thing, but why should we respect an organization that has a blatant disregard for the safety and general welfare of the people working there.

I say that we put out a voluntary edict that everyone deprivilege or miscode one key document everyday. This policy should be forwarded to the client and the court.

Anonymous said...

"The endless stream of unimaginative gibberish serves no purpose but to bury any legit comments. "


Correct!

Anonymous said...

"Anonymous said...
Thank you Stupid Sexy Flanders. Again you are not stupid at all and very sexy. I love you."



ha ha ha.
so funny.
what a scream.
you are sexy I love you. who could think of these imaginative line?

Imagine by the Beatles.
Imagine a world with no Temporarily Yours fakees and spam.
Imagine a world with no David, Helga, Sonia, Dick O., and Snot K.

Anonymous said...

11:28, so where's your legit comment(s)? How about making one.

Anonymous said...

I like Sonia and Helga. David, Emily, and Recruiter get on my nerves because they are obvious fake schticks.

Anonymous said...

Free Trailer Tom!!
Chump Change We Can Believe In!!

Anonymous said...

"11:28, so where's your legit comment(s)? How about making one."


Here's the comment. You're the same repetitive spammer over and over again.

And then you put in comments trying to suggest the fakees are different people, when it's the same nutcase.

P.S. where's your legit comment. sounds like you just are another Helga.

Anonymous said...

"I like Sonia and Helga. David, Emily, and Recruiter get on my nerves because they are obvious fake schticks."


Yes so true.

Helga and Sonia are so real, so creative, and so informative. Not like David.

Helga says "Snuggie People: Santa knows if you've been bad or good !!!!!"

oh wow, that is so funny. I'm dying from laughter.

How about Helga's "Bring in on Peeps! Where is Trailer Tom?? Baby, I'm 73 years old but its not too late! I will produce you a son who can carry on in your Trailer Tom Tradition."


soooooo funny. she's 73 years old. But maybe can have a baby.
oh please keep this comic genius coming.
Seinfeld you are out of business with the likes of Helga and Sonia.

Anonymous said...

"Dick O. says Shut up or I'll find you if you're on one of our projects and have you teabagged.

You are puny compared to us. Puny, puny, puny!!"



oh please I am cracking up.
That is so funny.
puny, puny, puny.

ha ha ha.

ha ha ha.

Anonymous said...

"Helga said...
Sonia - you are the bees' knees!!"


wow I love it when the fakees talk to each other.
And that line the bees knees, I was telling everyone in my neighborhood about that.

DICKHEAD OSMAN said...

OK, we'll make you a deal. We won't post the rest of the day. That means you have all day to post "legit comments," whatever those consist of.

"Legit comments" are a point of debate. What is considered "legit" on a blog called "Temporary Attorney: The Sweatshop Edition?" The blog's stated purpose is to expose "everyday life at the world's most notorious legal sweatshops."

Aren't hyperbole, parody, and nasty characterizations "legit" on such an anti-legal establishment blog? Humor to deal with the sweatshoop BS and a-holes like Snotm and I? How about humor to deal with the Tier 3 and student loan travesty, encapsulated into the super hybrid monster Massa-sar?

OK, now you can post your "legit comments." Bye bye for 24 hours.

Anonymous said...

"Hey Flanders, I like the humorous characters. I think they're really funny and hitting the nail on the head, and they've brightened my last few days. "

Posted by Helga a.k.a. Sonia a.k.a. David a.k.a. Temporarily Yours a.k.a. Dick O. a.k.a Snot K. etc.

Anonymous said...

"Bye bye for 24 hours."

You should be out of here permanently.
Your posting shows your only intent is to muddy the waters here of an otherwise good website.

Go get a job loser. Maybe at a comedy club. You can use your multiple personalities and see how the audience will be rolling in the eyes with your David intern jokes.

Anonymous said...

"DICKHEAD OSMAN said...
OK, we'll make you a deal. We won't post the rest of the day."

Thanks for admitting you're all the same person. As if there was any doubt.
You can turn them all off for 24 hours with a flick of the switch. Amazing you are!
Go bop an intern.

Anonymous said...

Massa-sar could rot in hell.

Anonymous said...

The guy who is having a mental breakdown because of the "fakes' is MORE OF A PAIN IN THE ASS than the fakes.

What happened baby? Did you just get dumped? Get fired? Holidays coming up and nowhere to go Looks like you are off your rocker than the rest.

Anonymous said...

I agree. Why the hell are you stressin? Maybe you are Dickhead yourself! If it bothers you so much, don't read the comments.

. said...

Wow, what a ruckus. This person having the breakdown has spammed the site more than I or the funny characters ever did. Look fella, I hardly have time to post on my stupid blog let alone sit here all day and create characters. I like this site - but not THAT much. I use a shared computer with several attorneys. Maybe they post some stuff - dunno. And yes my blog is retarded - because I want it to be so. The temp world is ghetto and idiotic and I don't want to get all serious about it and make it more than it is. Basically my blog is for me - to try and make sense of the stupidity around me - if anyone gets a laugh out of it good, if not, they probably have better things to do. I do other shit on the side so I am not going to spend all my time getting all serious about temping - I like to keep it light and bitch a little about crazy people I meet - but that's pretty much it. For me it really is just temping and not a long-term career. Anyway, if Tom wants some of us to stop posting here he can block us.

Anonymous said...

What happened to the "style icon" nazi John Buchenwald at Labatoilet

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

11:52

DONT' GET YOUR WALMART KNICKERS IN A KNOT!! DO YOU HAVE A WEDGIE???
DONT' GET YOUR WALMART KNICKERS IN A KNOT!! DO YOU HAVE A WEDGIE???
DONT' GET YOUR WALMART KNICKERS IN A KNOT!!DO YOU HAVE A WEDGIE???
DONT' GET YOUR WALMART KNICKERS IN A KNOT!! DO YOU HAVE A WEDGIE???

Anonymous said...

Wow, Osman and Snot Krawshitz sound really bad. I never registered w/ them, and don't think I want to now.
I thought Dine was bad. Clutch never follows through.