Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Pee In The Cup

"I heard RR Donnelley (the massive octopus legal outsourcing operation)is mass drug testing doc reviewers - if this is true, doc review is hurtling towards blue collar status."

55 comments:

fanofSkolnick said...

I have a PhD and have nonetheless peed into many different cups for so many different companies from newspapers to taxi cabs. It is a way to define your inferior position in a company. And it's like bringing your own rope to your own execution: they make you pay for the lab test!

And guess what: the guys who are stoners fake the test by taping a condom filled with clean urine to thier tummies.

This is invasion of privacy tacked on to absolute lunacy. Free country my ass. These anti-drug hotshots should be collecting urine samples themselves, hopefully by cupping their own hands together--then I'd give them samples freely.

Anonymous said...

I would venture a guess that 80% of reviewers are on some kind of substance in order to get through the mind numbingly grueling 10 hour days staring into a screen doing the most trivial boring work imaginable.

A drug also dulls the stunning realization that half of your paycheck will be going to Sallie Mae for the next thirty years, that you are uninsured, and that you will be treated like a pile of dog crap with no end in sight for the foreseeable future.

Now, a prescribed medication will certainly do the trick, but let's not forget I CAN'T AFFORD TO GO TO THE DOCTOR.

IF YOU AREN'T OFFERING HEALTH INSURANCE, STAY AWAY FROM MY URINE.

Anonymous said...

It's also credit checks:

Three years ago, after working as a temporary data entry clerk and receptionist for a Los Angeles skin care company, Debra Banks was pleased when her manager offered her a full-time job.

“I thought I was in for sure,” said Banks, 54. “I was getting praise about how hard I worked. I was pretty committed there because I thought I was going to get a full-time job.”

There were just a couple of formalities, including a check of her credit history.

“My heart dropped,” said Banks, who has no health insurance and a large unpaid medical bill. When the results came back, she said, the manager gave her the bad news. "Tomorrow’s your last day.”

Anonymous said...

It's actually pretty standard to take a drug test. I have had to do it (at no cost) before accepting a long term gig.

Seems just a formality to me. If you have a drug problem, too bad foe you. Otherwise, what is the big deal?

Anonymous said...

You'd have to be on drugs to last in the S&C dungeon. I don't know how else anyone could get through it.

Anonymous said...

Imagine eighty hour weeks being tortured by ghetto Mama for every waking moment of your day.

How could you not be on drugs, or kill yourself?

Anonymous said...

dental plan lisa needs braces

Friend said...

Drug tests are required for regular (at least in-house) legal positions too.

Anonymous said...

Merrill Corporation makes their doc reviewers do drug testing as well.

Nando said...

Too bad elected officials and CEOs aren't made to pee in a cup, as well. Then again "some animals are more equal than others."

The first commenter nailed it on the head. These tests are designed to keep you in your inferior position, lest you get the idea that you will move up in the company.

Unless you are SERIOUSLY connected, you will most assuredly NOT move up in the firm or company. You will perform tedious tasks and be treated like a pile of equine excrement. At which point, you will feel the need to numb your emotions and mind with illicit drugs.

Isn't it great!?! Wasn't law school a TERRIFIC decision?!?! For $ome rea$on, the law schools didn't mention such invasions of privacy in their marketing materials.

Rima solomon said...

Would u please leave me alone?

Anonymous said...

I don't know what you mean by "hurtling towards blue collar status." Doc review has always been blue collar, despite the fact that you may work in a fancy building. Didn't the fact that you work in the basement and they refuse to even call you attorneys tip you off to that fact?

How do you people afford illegal drugs anyway? I thought you were too busy squirming under Sallie Mae's thumb, half your paycheck gone on loans, can't afford insurance, unlivable wage, etc.

Lifer said...

You'll have to pull out my last tampon out with your teeth if you want my urine. Been in there since the war when I went menopausal.

Anonymous said...

Merrill Brink requires a urine test for doc review

Brian said...

I don't think this is unusual. There is too much fodder out there for you to complain about this.

highschoolteacher said...

Too bad weed is illegal

highschoolteacher said...

Marijuana plan. Lisa needs reefer.

highschoolteacher said...

this blog has jumped the bong

highschoolteacher said...

pull anita's tampon out with teeth

highschoolteacher said...

If I had just not caved into the pressure to inflate your grades

Anonymous said...

Just remember how much your elite overlords (you know who they are...wink...wink) love all of you mud people. The elite are allowed to be druggies, pedofiles and worse but you mudpeople are resigned to perpetual N Worddome.

Enjoy.

Anonymous said...

I would like to pee in a recruiter's mouth

Anonymous said...

What was the point of law school again?

Anonymous said...

"If you have a drug problem, too bad foe you. Otherwise, what is the big deal?"

Yeah, if you don't have anything to hide who cares if it's all out there? The 4th and 5th amendments are anachronisms anyway.

Anonymous said...

Love how the pro-drug test, "oh, it's not a big deal" guy is "Anonymous."

Anonymous said...

@10:16

I agree that having contract attorneys submit to a drug test is unnecessary, insulting, and disrespectful. Unfortunately, employers can drug test if they want, and happens all the time.

But PLEASE, don't through around 4th and 5th Amendment nonsense. Last time I checked, those amendments are applicable to criminal proceedings. Did you even go to law school?

Anonymous said...

Yawn. I've had to do this for a number of positions. Is it embarrasing? Yeah it is. Is it a hastle? A little bit. But in the grand scheme of things, this is nothing.

Anonymous said...

Forum makes people go through drug testing. They did it to me. A hell hole of an offsite lab full of ghetto.
They make it as demeaning as possible. You have a law degree from Hoftsra but they think you are a drug addict.

Anonymous said...

The dean at Hofstra told me people "know Hofstra" when you are looking for a job.

Anonymous said...

Chinga-ling Chinga-ling Take me down to the fields where the grass is Where the glasses lie MP3, MP3, ... You just have to holler at me. NYC, NYC, woah woah ... Ill see you later. Call me, you know my number.

Anonymous said...

Re Drug testing....don't think it is a big deal, unless you have a problem with substance abuse. For that, I'd feel badly for anyone stricken with the issue. Not easy. But, they probably are correct to do it based on what I've seen...loads of people out there and when they are "high" on the job, it makes life tough on everyone..just finished three (3) years with someone daily who came "flying' into work, and there is no way their work product was even near adequate, plus not easy to deal with unpredictable outbursts...makes life tough on everyone, and after awhile we shouldn't have to deal with their issues.

Anonymous said...

@6:49

Policies and values behind them, genius.

Unknown said...

How disgusting! To be treated like a common criminal to do "legal work." How low will they go. I agree that most attorneys have a substance abuse problem, but I think it's alcohol... which drug tests don't tell you about. So what's the point???

The Yuppie Attorney said...

From:Mgmt (We are always on top)
To:You temps (we don't know your name nor care to)
Date: whenever they put this out.
RE: Random secret drug test this coming week.

Whoever you people are:

IT is now en vogue to have these drug tests. Frankly, HR needs things to do during the hiring freeze. Also, we want to axe some people. If you imbibe, then stop if you want your jobs, else BYE BYE! Oh! Attorneys please start clocking in and out. It's hard to mess up you paychecks if we don't know the correct answer is.

If this is your second drug test; why the hell are you still here?

mgnt.

P.S. We have a new cover sheets for the TPS reports. WE started this last week. We didn't care to tell you. Your supervisors will reprimand you for not using it.

http://redstaplerchronicles.com/

Anonymous said...

They can test me for drugs/alcohol or sexually transmitted diseases. As a temp, I can't afford to take drugs, drink or pick up women.

Anonymous said...

I think drug testing is a great idea.

Anonymous said...

In this economy and considering my survival and that of my family's carrys more weight than your con law principles, I'll forgo a slight infringment when it comes to something like substance abuse, particularly when others' welfare on the job frankly carries more weight than your need to adhere to whatever you think is righteous....I'd think of far more important issues to back on policy than protecting some screwball with a substance abuse problem, particularly when they make your life at work nuts. Sorry, Mr./Ms. Genius, too practical to care on this issue.,,,feeding my kids is more important.

Anonymous said...

If a project is so friggin sensitive that the firm has to drug test, so be it. But at least be willing to pay for coders with a Security Clearance. Otherwise, STFU and hire the best people that you can and cut them if they appear to be under the influence of a controlled substance or are otherwise impaired. I've worked with so many wack jobs that I would be happy to have all applicants submit to a psych screening prior to being assigned to a project - it would be far more useful than drug screening.

Gotta go now and get my beer before the inconvenience store closes.

Anonymous said...

drug testing is for high school dropouts that operate heavy machinery in mowing the lawn and retrieving large boxes from warehouse. Attorneys do not do anything remotely life threatening.

Anonymous said...

I must do drugs to numb ass pain from reaming by recruiters and bat-shit crazy associates. But reaming made me think of another kindof job where i stand in hollywood with a backpack and do it with johns. Cash upfront, no SDI, but good income from UI about to run out.

My shithole hurts, tho.

Anonymous said...

Man I wanna stab myself out of this misery. Turned down for $25/hour in OC!!! Awwwrwrwewwrsdsxsc

Anonymous said...

Looks to me like the market is only calling for permanent placement and for attorneys willing to go perm and move away from reliance on doc reviews. Sadly, no one yet has answered if there are ANY ongoing doc reviews or intended doc reviews of anything longer than 10 days or "mere promises" that get canceled due to the client e.g. agency was beat out of competition for placing by another competing agency.

Anonymous said...

My law degree isn't worth anything. Law school was the worst mistake of my life. I am in misery and Sallie Mae is my pimp/master/overlord. It's all good though, the Mayan calendar ends in 2012. END GAME.My law degree isn't worth anything. Law school was the worst mistake of my life. I am in misery and Sallie Mae is my pimp/master/overlord. It's all good though, the Mayan calendar ends in 2012. END GAME.My law degree isn't worth anything. Law school was the worst mistake of my life. I am in misery and Sallie Mae is my pimp/master/overlord. It's all good though, the Mayan calendar ends in 2012. END GAME.My law degree isn't worth anything. Law school was the worst mistake of my life. I am in misery and Sallie Mae is my pimp/master/overlord. It's all good though, the Mayan calendar ends in 2012. END GAME.My law degree isn't worth anything. Law school was the worst mistake of my life. I am in misery and Sallie Mae is my pimp/master/overlord. It's all good though, the Mayan calendar ends in 2012. END GAME.My law degree isn't worth anything. Law school was the worst mistake of my life. I am in misery and Sallie Mae is my pimp/master/overlord. It's all good though, the Mayan calendar ends in 2012. END GAME.My law degree isn't worth anything. Law school was the worst mistake of my life. I am in misery and Sallie Mae is my pimp/master/overlord. It's all good though, the Mayan calendar ends in 2012. END GAME.

Anonymous said...

He3h "Mayan Calendar" guy/gal....if you place your entire identity into a "piece of paper for the brain" you will miss out on life. You pursued the degree merely to add to your exiting talents, to offer a new skill set, to improve job prospect to earn money to make your life better and to assist providing for and share with your loved ones. Don't lose sight of the key...to share and contribute to happiness for your self and loved ones....heck, you have a brain, with a set of skills enhanced by the challenge of studying the law...merely think out of the box and figure out a new way to apply all of your skills. Who says you have to limit yourself to the practice of law..there is a bridge from it to somewhere....you'll find it.

Anonymous said...

3:01-

Dude, I've been looking for that bridge for 2 years...still can't find it.

Anonymous said...

MERRILL CORP does a credit check and a urine test.

You have to go to the drug lab on your own time. Suckage

Anonymous said...

Forget a cup. I would like to bestow my golden parachute upon ALL recruiters and law firm partners that use and abuse us. They can drug test my urine in their mouth.

Anonymous said...

I meant my golden shower...

Anonymous said...

My law degree isn't worth anything. Law school was the worst mistake of my life. I am in misery and Sallie Mae is my pimp/master/overlord. It's all good though, the Mayan calendar ends in 2012. END GAME.My law degree isn't worth anything. Law school was the worst mistake of my life. I am in misery and Sallie Mae is my pimp/master/overlord. It's all good though, the Mayan calendar ends in 2012. END GAME.My law degree isn't worth anything. Law school was the worst mistake of my life. I am in misery and Sallie Mae is my pimp/master/overlord. It's all good though, the Mayan calendar ends in 2012. END GAME.My law degree isn't worth anything. Law school was the worst mistake of my life. I am in misery and Sallie Mae is my pimp/master/overlord. It's all good though, the Mayan calendar ends in 2012. END GAME.My law degree isn't worth anything. Law school was the worst mistake of my life. I am in misery and Sallie Mae is my pimp/master/overlord. It's all good though, the Mayan calendar ends in 2012. END GAME.My law degree isn't worth anything. Law school was the worst mistake of my life. I am in misery and Sallie Mae is my pimp/master/overlord. It's all good though, the Mayan calendar ends in 2012. END GAME.My law degree isn't worth anything. Law school was the worst mistake of my life. I am in misery and Sallie Mae is my pimp/master/overlord. It's all good though, the Mayan calendar ends in 2012. END GAME.

Lorraine the Temp said...

RR Donnely is the printing arm of Merrill Corp. Merrill Brink, another subsidiary ran the doc review project on another floor at Donnely location (Varick & Houston) and had a pissing contest for temps on drugs.

Anonymous said...

Blue class would be better at least you would have some bargaining power, and even a prevailing wage law

Term Papers said...

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Anonymous said...

I was at that job. In order to avoid paying overtime, they also hired a second shift of attorneys who worked from 7 pm until the wee hours of the morning. And they had a person sitting at the entrance with a list of names, recording when we came and left. And they forgot to do conflicts forms until the day before most of the attorneys were let go. And they screwed up getting a bunch of paychecks out. And they literally locked us out of their kitchen. It was the most mismanaged project I've been on.

Don't work for them if you can avoid it.

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