Thursday, June 25, 2009

Labaton

"Dear Tom,

I emailed the below complaint to the powers that be at Labaton at 140 Broadway on Friday, and by Monday there was a big change in attitude at 225 Varick Street, the offsite location where we work. No more having to go search for a staff attorney to input your time four times a day. In fact, now you write your time yourself for when you arrive and depart for the day; you do not have to notate a lunch break on the timesheet. Staff Attorney is trying not to be an animal, but it's hard for him not to act like a dick. Stay tuned. Hold these people accountable if they mistreat you.

Thanks for making your blog available so that we can fight back against these abuses.


From: @rocketmail.com>
Subject: Countrywide Project
To: @labaton.com, @labaton.com, @labaton.com
Date: Friday, June 19, 2009, 2:30 AM


I believe you should know what is going on at 225 Varick Street. I am an experienced contract attorney and I have worked under some horrible conditions in my time, but your treatment of your so-called short-term attorneys ranks as one of the worst experiences I have had in my career. On any project that I have worked on, if you have to sign in and out when you arrive and leave for the day and notate breaks as well, you do so yourself. However at Varick Street, I have to locate one of your two staff attorneys who could be in any of the four rooms in order to inform them when I arrive in the morning, when I leave at night or when I take a break for lunch, both going to and returning from lunch. Then after I locate one staff attorney, I may be told by him or her that I have to track down the other one because the timesheet is with that person. Do you realize how time consuming this is when you have about fifty attorneys doing this, each doing it four times a day? Do you understand how demoralizing it is to be micromanaged like this? And you have the nerve to label us as employee attorneys on your website. This is insane! Why can’t we just input our time on the timesheet ourselves? Why does a staff attorney have to input our time?

How about these other rules? You can't eat at your workstation, not even a candy bar or a piece of fruit; you have to take an elevator and go to another floor. You can't use the microwave or the kitchenette on the floor; you have to take an elevator and go to another floor. You can't answer your cellphone and step out of the room to answer a call. You have to ignore the call and again take the elevator and go to another floor. It seems like that you are riding the elevator all day in order to do basic everyday activities. All this we are told because we can't offend Merrill Corporation. Who or what is this entity? I have worked at the top law firms in the city and they never subjected me to this kind of nonsense.

Do you think that when you treat attorneys so disrespectfully that they will do a good job for you and be conscientious in reviewing documents? I don’t think so!

It is bad enough that you are paying attorneys a pitiful rate, but they will not put up with lousy treatment for long combined with your low flat rate. You will have a mass defection when a decent project comes along. Also, your treatment of “employees” will be exposed in blog world and your law firm will be embarrassed.

In addition, your staff attorney John B, is nasty and unprofessional. He fosters a negative work environment and he has no people skills. The attorneys who work on your project there despise his pettiness. He should not be managing a doc review of a high profile case. He does not even dress in a professional manner and you expect your short-term attorneys to dress in business casual.

I suggest you make some changes before this project gets out of hand."

202 comments:

1 – 200 of 202   Newer›   Newest»
Anonymous said...

You won't be able to jump. Labaton is a plaintiff's firm. No biglaw firm will ever touch you for document review again.

beerguzzlingtemp said...

I was called for this job. I'm glad it didn't work out for me. They sound like total assholes. The staff attorney there needs a slap...maybe that will wake him the fuck up.

Anonymous said...

We say "your staff attorney John B, is nasty and unprofessional" and then use all this foul language.

Recruiter said...

Foul language is very unbecoming of a professional. At our agency, we have instituted a "demerit point system" directed against our job candidates. Arriving at work more than 15 minutes late, along with the the use of the F and S words, earns you one demerit.

Anonymous said...

We should take a collective breathe >> the environment is not so bad, and neither is John. And Anon at 942a: the blackball of plaintiff gigs is predominantly among the pharmaceutical gigs.

Anonymous said...

We should take a collective breath >> the environment is not so bad, and neither is John. And Anon at 942a: the blackball of plaintiff gigs is predominantly among the pharmaceutical gigs.

Anonymous said...

Not true, 10:19. Talk to the temporary recruiting coordinator at any biglaw defense shop. Most have been directed to throw aside any resume with plaintiff firms listed on them. Why go through the trouble of a potential conflict problem when you can just get someone else to do the job at the forefront?

Anonymous said...

there are some rules that are bit of a stretch, i.e. the no food or phone calls on this floor. But it is NOT that bad, it is actually a very laid back environment.

And John is a very cool guy.

Anonymous said...

Oh please. This place is a hell hole. Not only is John a total asshole, but the conditions here suck. Everyone is crammed in like sardines and the precious break room is disgusting, has mouse traps everywhere, and is completely barren of supplies. The Merrill people are also total assholes and hate that we're here. When they're going out of their way to get us in trouble for talking on the phone too loudly in the breakroom (the ONE place we're allowed to do it, and where the TV is blasting half the time anyway) they can pretty much kiss my ass.

Slappy Dee said...

The Broadcom job is smooth sailing. Feel sorry for you Countrywiders. We are literally across the hall and haven't heard one complaint yet.

Recruiter said...

11:11: Get back to coding and mind your own business, sweetie.

Anonymous said...

9:42,

Don't be so mellow-dramatic; have you ever heard of writing your resume with discretion about what to put and what to exclude to suit the next position for which you are applying.

Anonymous said...

Whoever wrote this complaint to the people at Labaton has my upmost respect in standing up for what he or she believe is right and wrong. To that person, you're the MAN or the WOMAN!

The Yuppie Attorney said...

The want us to take a big step back to time cards, name tags, and uniforms. I thought when you left school and attained a professional license; they would stop treating you like a McEmployee.

Anonymous said...

Recruiter,

You are a parasite on the legal community and your thoughts are not welcome here. Shove your demerit point system.

Recruiter said...

I suggested to one of my clients that we have the contract attorneys all wear snocks of a certain size with "temp" written across the front and back. This would prevent people from wandering too far off from their project spaces and would prevent some general fashion faux pas. Ladies, if you are beyond a certain girth, I don't want to see your bellies hanging out esp on the weekend.

Anonymous said...

Does this project require substantive work, such as researching andinputting information. The reason I ask is that I know of someone who is on this project and that person told me that the Labaton project is not a traditional doc review project, that it involves substantive work. Since aforementioned person has a tendency to embellish things I was wondering if someone cares to emlighten me as to the nature of this project...

Anonymous said...

1:45 PM..I've heard you are way beyond "a certain girth"..sadness..if you can afford it try Jenny Craig..it worked for Kirstie..

beerguzzlingtemp said...

Recruiter. The smock idea sounds like something you would suggest. Maybe on the projects you staff, you could require the temps to wear a dunce cap so there is no confusion between who is a temp or an associate? You need a dick in your mouth.

Anonymous said...

3:43 PM is right on!
http://www.jennycraig.com/

Anonymous said...

yeah 942, you are totally wrong

Better Coder said...

As many of you have been asking me in private emails and tweets, yes, I was selected for the Labaton project. Unfortunately for the plaintiff's bar and mortgagors all across the country, I had to turn them down.

The pay was, very simply, appalling.

Best,
Fly Money Coder

Anonymous said...

I don't know. I have this weird sexual attraction to the staff attorney everybody is complaining about. Maybe nastiness turns me on in a perverted sort of way.

Anonymous said...

Recruiter - I would consider a demerit from your stupid agency a badge of honor. What are you so proud of? You are just a glorified pimp.

Anonymous said...

Recruiter - your suggestion that contract workers wear certain shirts saying temp is like the yellow star with the word "Jude" that Jews were forced to wear in Nazi-occupied Europe. I don't believe you are even a recruiter, which is nothing to be proud of anyway.

Anonymous said...

Actually I heard Recruiter wanted all black coders to wear a black smock with an outline of Africa on it, with a picture of a Zulu Warrior in the map.

She wanted all white coders to wear a white smock with an outline of Europe and a pic of King Henry XIII (for guys) and Catherine of Aragon (for girls).

She wanted all Asian coders to wear yellow smocks with an outline of Asia, and a big dragon picture inside the outline.

And she wanted all Hispanic coders to wear brown smocks with (their choice) a pic of a low-rider car with a sexy girl, or a feathered Aztec god, and the inscription "Viva La Raza".

As for Jewish coders, she wanted them to wear blue and white smocks, with tassels, and a picture of Albert Einstein on them, and an outline of Israel.

I heard Recruiter said these were "positive role models" and that the coders should just "suck it up and wear them, and be proud of their ethnic heritage."

Anonymous said...

Geezus people, "Recruiter" is just a troll - she's too fat & ugly to get laid so she has to get off by getting you riled up. Ignore the bitch.

beerguzzlingtemp said...

I'm certain recruiter girl is unattractive.

Anonymous said...

I am officially in love with Beer Guzzling Temp after his remark to recruiter " You need a dick in your mouth."

Yaaaaaaaaay. Way to go beer guzzler!!!

Anonymous said...

This is the best thing that has happened!!! These kind of letters need to be written more often. Sometimes the lawyers themselves are not so bad and not even aware of the teriible conditions in the sweatshops and it's good to let them know. Often the petty low-level under-educated under-class TTT ghetto goon staff attorneys create cesspools.


As the writer of one such letter to a partner in my OWN NAME I can tell you that it felt pretty damn good!!! Although those fuckers may never hire me again, they can kiss my ass. I have much better plans for the future than sitting in a hot sweatshop coding like some scared Third World kid, I am hard-working, responsible -- and refuse to be brow-beating by some ghetto bullies not fit to polish my shoes. Way to go for this letter writer!!!!! This is the happiest moment for me. We could use some MORE whistle-blowers!!!

Anonymous said...

What a shame, what a shame. Barred lawyers in 21st Century, US of A, the greatest superpower/civilization the world has ever seen, are treated like THIRD WORLD SWEATSHOP KIDS - like kids in Honduras or Vietnam or China. SHAME ON THIS COUNTRY, SHAME ON THE LAW, and the law firms. WHAT A JOKE!!!

Anonymous said...

6:29 said "Geezus people, "Recruiter" is just a troll - she's too fat & ugly to get laid so she has to get off by getting you riled up. Ignore the bitch."

Yes, yes, and yes...most thin pretty ladies are out and about in this lovely weather with their beaus--only ugly trolls are sitting at home and writing -- [barring the temp attorneys because this blog is of actual use to them].

Anonymous said...

Why are there no decent staff attorneys?? Looks like they raided the ghettos of every race - white, yellow, brown, black and took the worst of the trolls and wenches and made them all staff attorneys.

These people are so low-level and unrefined. "Massa's" henchmen -- assholes!!

Anonymous said...

I pity the temp attorneys - I am not a lawyer but a writer and worked temporarily at Paul Weiss a few years ago in their coding room. It was a huge shock to my system!! But luckily I don't live in the legal world and for me there was an escape back to the writing world. I don't know how you guys put up with it.

I have met many of you and some are genuine nuts and loons - but many of you are really cool and intelligent. If I had been a lawyer I would have kicked someone's ass by now. I wish you all the best of luck! And I am sure if you work together you could help improve things.

Anonymous said...

Staff Attorneys = Trolls, Pigs and Wenches

Anonymous said...

"we can't offend Merrill Corporation. Who or what is that entity?"

Nice research skillz...

Who or what is google?

http://www.merrillcorp.com

Anonymous said...

Merrill's salesboys are really sleazy. When I worked at S&C they would come by ALL the time to chit chat their stupid low-level conversations in an attempt to get more work from me. That would ANNOY the hell out of me and actually I would give them less work so I wouldn't have to spend another few hours listening to their stupid guido stories.

I was like actually Merill boys the less you talk, the more work you will get. They act so "social" and slick -- but who wants to listen to their shit -- stupid morons!

Anonymous said...

I agree. They have a few "pretty boys" that they use to "loosen up" the girl paras with their flirty flirty talk. But many of the smart ladies don't have time for these guidos...who does???

So their strategy doesn't really work.

Anonymous said...

8:03pm
It is very clear to me that the writer of the complaint is asking who is Merrill in the sense of how dare they act this way, but I guess that one went right over your head. Maybe you should look up rhetorical question on google!

Anonymous said...

Legal Pecking Order of America:

Obama

Roberts

Biden

Holder

Ted Kennedy

Barney Frank

Soto

Robert Shapiro

BigLaw Partners

Nancy Grace

BigLaw Senior Associates

BigLaw Mid-Level Associates

BigLaw Junior Associates

BigLaw Staff Attorneys

Better Coder

Employed Temp Coders

Shitlaw Attorneys

Unemployed Temp Attorneys

Suicidal Unemployed Temp Attorneys

Anonymous said...

If you are on the La-bowl-ton prject please discreetly leave fecal matter in secret places around the office.

Anonymous said...

Suicidal Unemployed Temp Attorneys


That is me!!!

Anonymous said...

I am honored to represent the SUTA's of this world - Suicical Unemployed Temp Attorneys.

Just as I was preparing the noose I got a call at 9pm by an recruiter whore asking me if I was available to go to work at 8am tomorrow. I said yes, and then she goes OK I will submit your resume and we'll see how it goes. I was like bitch what time are you going to get back to me 3 a.m.?

As if this shit doesn't make you want to kill yourself!!I will now proceed with testing the rope...

Anonymous said...

Don't fall for it.

The recruiter is probably just jerking you around. She will make you stay up all night, while she auto sends you a thanks for playing message at 6 am.

My advice is pour yourself a glass of cheap vodka, turn off the phone, and pass out early.

Anonymous said...

6:02 - perhaps its the ridiculously small shirt?







(ewww....)

Anonymous said...

As if this shit doesn't make you want to kill yourself!!I will now proceed with testing the rope...

There are alternatives to doc. review. Maybe you should explore them. Working at small/mid-size firm with a cool boss has lots of perks even if you don't make as much per week as when you're temping. These complaints about "shitlaw" relate only to a few of the ins. defense firms out there. Doc. review on the other hand generally sucks no matter what.

Better Coder said...

All,

I agree with most of you that have written. It is a sad day. We are here at Niki Beach complete with Belvedere and Red Bull table service all mourning the loss of The King of Pop.

Anyway, thought Id also let everybody know I was sought out by a other agency tonight. Unfortunately, I had to turn them down.

Best,
Better Coder

Anonymous said...

My brother and his wife have nearly 50 years professional experience between them, and neither one of them has a proper job right now. They're raising three children on savings and shitty $10-15 an hour temp jobs.

Meanwhile you people are whining about the horrible abuses you're suffering at your $40 an hour jobs because you have to tell a supervisor when you're coming and going and can't stuff your faces at your computers?

Pathetic. This whole site is pathetic and an insult to people who actually work for a living.

Anonymous said...

LABATON = LOBOTOMY job.

Anonymous said...

12:32 - Perhaps your overly experienced brother and his wife should take their start temping at somewhere other than Starbucks. The pay isn't anywhere near $40 these days, but it IS better than $10-15.


Or maybe they could sell off one or two of those kids...

Anonymous said...

Heal the world, make it a better place...

Anonymous said...

All of you can fuck off and die.

Anonymous said...

any idea why labaton felt it neccessary to conduct credit checks via trainsunion on contract attys?

Anonymous said...

12:32 - Call up child's services and tell them to take your brother's kids away. Obviously, he is a failure and neglectful if he can't even get a job at Starbucks.

Anonymous said...

Please drop off your fecal matter as a special delivery to Labowlton.

Anonymous said...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michael_Jackson

Recruiter said...

credit checks are the wave of the future. How can you be trusted to handle the sensitive information of our elite law firm clients, if you can't even balance your own checkbook?

Anonymous said...

The agencies never check credit; otherwise I would have never been hired for any projects.

Recruiter said...

If you are being picked up for projects, then there is no reason why you should have poor credit. Shame on you, for your delinquent financial habits.

Anonymous said...

Pay in cash for everything and the credit card companies will fall (as they already are), God Bless & Let the revolution begin!! Down w/ the system!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Farrah_Fawcett

beerguzzlingtemp said...

We need more whistleblowers like this Labaton temp. The firm should know about the misfits in their basements managing projects.

The Yuppie Attorney said...

I have a question out there maybe one of you experienced Doc Reviewers can answer: "How are Doc Review Recruiters paid?"

When I worked in I.T.; they were paid a % of project intake. They had to keep the body count requistion up and the contract must be renewed. They made about 20 to 40K. How different is Legal Doc Review Recruiters paid?

Anonymous said...

Legal Doc Review recruiters start at about $45K, but within 2 years, they can be making $80 plus commish, which actually usually works out to double that -- an average of about $160K. In the current bad economy, the commissions are lower, so the typical 2nd year recruiter makes only about $90-120K.

In addition to base salary and commissions, about half of all legal recruiters, usually the ones in big markets, also usually get what's called "expert placement points" (EPP), where they can make up to an additional $20-30K a month. They usually get EPPs when staffing hard-to-find temps, like attorneys fluent in Korean, Dari, Pushto, Latvian, Quechua, Swahili, etc. Usually only recruiters who are 3rd or 4th years or higher get access to EPPs.

This can mean that a lot of 'em can pull in a good $500K a year.

Anonymous said...

Sign that I am on a downward spiral.

It's one o'clock in the afternoon. I just discovered that the cheap bottle of wine that I just got doesn't even have a cork, it has a twist off cap.

Anonymous said...

These letters are a good idea. I think it would be far more effective however to write to the judge on the case rather than the managing partner.

Better Coder said...

All,

As a lot of you have been wondering in your facebook messages, private email messages, tweets and SMS texts to me on my new Iphone 3Gs, yes, I am super-excited about my LeBernadin reservations, followed by drinks at the Bryant Park Hotel tonight.

I will be attending with some recruiter friends. It should be a great time in preparation for my 8 hour day tomorrow.!

Also, hopefully I can duck out to Mavi for a couple pair of jeans tommorrow. Time to replenish after having spilled my Belvedere/Red Bull on my Lucky'slast night.

Very Truly Yours,
Better Coder

Anonymous said...

Hi BC,

That's great that you told everybody where you'll be tonight. Me and the Posse from Cravvie -- Snuffy, Lil' Kim, Deeva, Susan (maybe), Chester, Dr. Dan, Young Joe, Victor the Wop and Ruffles wanna crash!

One Love,

Skeeter

Anonymous said...

Please drop off your fecal matter as a special delivery to Alex Gaylard.

He's building a statue of himself in the likeness of David.

Also, someone bring a toothpick. It will be used for the penis.

Anonymous said...

Know your facts legal recruiters for the temp market make paltry sums..ususally around 30-40K, so sit back doc reviewers you're making tons more than they ever will because you have an advanced degree..remember they need you more than you need them..they're mere salesmen shopping at Conway & eating Popeyes..rise up! the revolution is coming!

Anonymous said...

2:03 PM is 100% incorrect..recruiters cap out at around 50K..temps make way more than them..besides the recruiting industy as a whole is dying and will cease to exist soon..firms have realized they dont need to deal with useless middlemen and will go back to the old ways of direct hire..YOLANDA YOUNG!

Anonymous said...

Hiring an agency in no way prevents the hassle of a Yolanda Young lawsuit.

Anonymous said...

Hey 2:55!

Who u callin' "100% incorrect"?!!

My facts is just that -- facts!!

Anonymous said...

Headhunters/Recruiters in general are dying breeds.

Anonymous said...

American middle class workers are a dying breed.

Anonymous said...

I've seen so many of these "recruiters" crammed into tiny offices without A/C, piled on top of one another, desparate for any leads to place attorneys..its so sad...temps your lives are so much better..these recruiters even try to steal resumes from other recruiters just trying to make ends meat..its like Les Mis...gladly this industry is fading fast due to a return to direct hires

Anonymous said...

The West is over, America is dead.

Anonymous said...

I am getting really tired of hearing about all the whining on the Labaton project. There are 40,000 JDs that just got pushed out by Joan King (who will have nothing to do in one month) that would love to have your jobs.

Anonymous said...

Staff Attorneys = Goat Fuckers

Recruiters = Pig Fuckers

Down with the agency business!!

Law firms recruit us directly!!

We are NOT as crazy as you think!

These agency whores drive us nuts!!!

Anonymous said...

Down with miserable recruiters!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Better Coder said "Anyway, thought Id also let everybody know I was sought out by a other agency tonight. Unfortunately, I had to turn them down."

What was your reason THIS time weiner boy??

Anonymous said...

When these recruiter whores make a call after 8pm for work the next day it better be a definite project--don't let them make you wait till 12 or 1 a.m while they "submit the resume".

That is code for "we'll get back to me if we can't get anyone of our FAT SADDELBAG ghetto girlfriends".

No one is "submitting a resume" after 9pm for a next day project. Are you kidding me. Many of these instant projects are left up to the recruiter whore's discretion.

Anonymous said...

"My brother and his wife have nearly 50 years professional experience between them, and neither one of them has a proper job right now. They're raising three children on savings and shitty $10-15 an hour temp jobs. "

Dear Sir:
While I empathise with your bro's condition. Did it occur to you that he might be doing something wrong. Even I as a law student in NYC and in this economy I can pull in $25/hour.

Anonymous said...

Vive La Revolucion!!!

Storm the agencies!!

Anonymous said...

The revolution is coming!!!

The revolution is coming!!!

The revolution is coming!!!

Anonymous said...

I am sick of sucking recruiter whore ass!!!

Anonymous said...

Michael Jackson lives!

Anonymous said...

Fuck Michael Jackson -- what about the Revolution!!!

beerguzzlingtemp said...

I received a few late night calls for projects which never materialized the next day. One recruiter called me after 11pm, and never notified me the next day about whether the project was proceeding. She never returns calls either.

Anonymous said...

I bet Big Momma over there at S&C has her widow hat on - I hope that elephantress has finally stopped eating for a day for Mike Jackson's death!

Anonymous said...

3:13

The part about America going down the tubes is true... China is right now pushing for a world currency to replace the dollar as the International Reserve Currency... China will get that because the US does not have the power to oppose it. We have absolutely no economic leverage yet. China's economy is still growing 7%+ while we're shrinking... that's a recession to them but they're the first ones bouncing out of it, which shows their economy is fundamentally much more healthy than ours. Warren Buffet said the US economy is in "a shambles" 2 days ago and says the recovery will be feeble? Why? Because we are going down the proverbial toilet!

Anonymous said...

Who gives a fuck about Michael Jackson. He screwed up his life and we should feel sorry for him. Here we sit, deceived by the ABA and law schools, willing to work without options.

Anonymous said...

3:52 Yes, last night's recruiter also didn't call.

I gave up the idea of hanging myself because I now live to make these bitches as miserable as they make me!!

Fuck cunt, the least you could have done is placed a quick call or e-mail saying that you had found your FAT SADDLEBAG GHETTO BITCH BIG-MAC EATING STRAWBERRY MILKSHAKE SLURPING PAYLESS WEARING GIRLFRIEND to take the project and that I shouldn't wait.

Anonymous said...

"FAT SADDELBAG ghetto girlfriends"

Amen to that! In this economy, you can't even count on any of the "confirmed" projects. Many times, without you even knowing it, you are merely a backup standby candidate for the fat saddlebag ghetto queens. If the fat saddleass queens agree to take the project, even a minute before the project starts, you are cooked.

Anonymous said...

Little-known fact about Michael Jackson: he earned a JD from Golden Gate University in '87 and worked sporadically as a temp in LA from 1988-93.

Anonymous said...

Michael Jackson had terrible debt issues. He owed out more money than contract attorneys.

Anonymous said...

I have worked with the DREGS of society on some of these peoject --namely these fat lazy cunts who are there simply because they are a recruiter's friend -- De Novo is especially notorious for this. Some of the people they place on projects should not be leaving THE PROJECTS - they should stay in the hood, and roll around in the hay.

They totally fuck up the heard-working vibe of others with their malaise - and if you say anything to them they claim racism or act so offended. I worked with a bitch who was totally fucking up a project and when I told her to do things properly she claimed I was being racist -- and I am a minority too!! Fuck these cunts and the cunty recruiters that would rather hire them than hard-working normal people.

Anonymous said...

3;59 said "Little-known fact about Michael Jackson: he earned a JD from Golden Gate University in '87 and worked sporadically as a temp in LA from 1988-93."

No wonder he became an utter loon. Now we know what drove him crazy!!

Anonymous said...

Oboy!! I am going to get some strawberry milkshake and some Payless clothes and go make friends with a recruiter - hey giiiiiiirl, wassssssup, I'm from the hood, too. Gimmeeee some loooooove....paaaaaaaaapi.....

Anonymous said...

4:05, I've noticed the same thing. They hire these ghetto cows. The classy black women I've worked with get fewer calls. The ones that are nasty tubs of lard are always working.

Anonymous said...

Biglaw likes to hire token minority contract attorneys because they think it resolves them of responsibility for being elitist and for assisting in the economic destruction of the United States. You don't think the bankers created those subprime derivatives on their own, do you?

Anonymous said...

sorry, meant to say absolved.

Anonymous said...

The worst part about it that I am not even a loser temp. I am very responsible,and hard-working.
I temp because I am setting up my business. But when at work I give 100%.

But I never get the good assignments because I don't "conversate" with the recruiter hookers.

I wish law firms would start hiring directly or something -- because I am sure there are a lot of decent hard-working temps out there who are not getting placed because they don't pass the ghetto-meter.

One guy I worked with he never took a shower even in the summer, his pants were always torn in the back and I could see his underwear, he smelled of vomit because he also worked at a bar at night, he was always coughing up phlegm -- and as for work, he did none. But because he told the Update whores jokes and gossip about the hard-working temps he always got placed at the big firms.

Sometimes it does not pay to be nice and decent -- when in the ghetto play ghetto!!

Anonymous said...

Interesting, I worked at Fitzpatrick and noticed the same thing. There were a few lazy fat paralegals that no one really liked because they did no work. The only person who seemed to protect them was, ironically the paralegal manager, because they provided her with juicy gossip on the other paras and managers - who said what, who was sleeping with who, who wore what.

Thin, smart people have a lot of other shit going on. They are not going to serve low-class cunts with little tidbits of information like some fishwife. The ambitious motivated people are out and about - it's only going to be the fat, ugly, stupid people who are going to play this game.

And so they are going to be useful to the hiring people in that low way. But in the long-run triumph will be on the side of the good, ambitious people. They will get somewhere while the fact fucks will still be eating chicken and slurping shakes and temping in another ghtetto sweatshop.
Don't lose heart.

beerguzzlingtemp said...

Michael Jackson was too frail. Being thin like that does damage to internal organs. He didn't have an energetic healthy glow.

Anonymous said...

Thin, frail and brain damaged...sort of like Alex Faggallard

Anonymous said...

Yeah, unlike you beer guzzler. If that picture is any real indication of you -- you should have the glow of a full moon!! Ha, ha...you are one fat Mother%$##

Anonymous said...

I have a healthy energetic glow. I work out, I eat right - but where does that get me. I am unemployed and suicidal. Maybe if I were thin and on drugs I would be better off because then I would be able to put up with a lot more shit.

Healthy energetic glowing people are NOT going to be successful in the temp world. First they should not be there, but if by some misfortune they do find themselves there they will not be able to take it and their health and vitality will tell some recruiter whore or pig-fucker staff attorney to shove it up their ass.

So, in the temp world it is best to be frail, docile, weak wimp. Of and on drugs.

I bet Better Coder is a reedy veggie-eating deer fella - that is why he is good in the temp world. he is a vegetable.

He is one loony bird.

Anonymous said...

The Chicago Tribune has uncovered a “jobs-for-entry” scandal at the University of Illinois College of Law, in which the law school admitted politically-connected applicants, some unqualified, in exchange for guarantees of jobs for law graduates.

In one example, recorded in emails obtained by the paper, University of Illinois Chancellor Richard Herman coerced the law school in accepting an unqualified applicant backed by then-Governor Rod Blagojevich. The governor’s representative promised Herman that in exchange, five law school graduates would get jobs.

In other emails, Law School Dean Heidi Hurd insisted that the law firms hire the graduates regardless of academic performance.

Governor Pat Quinn has called for a state commission to investigate the University of Illinois admissions process, after the Chicago Tribune reported that more than 800 undergraduate applicants in the last five years received special consideration because they were backed by University trustees and legislators.

The University of Illinois College of Law is the law school of the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign, the flagship campus of the public University of Illinois university system. The College is located in Champaign, Illinois. It is ranked 23rd in the nation for 2009 by US News & World Report.

Anonymous said...

6:00, Alex Gayllard is a fucking weasel. He'll get his. What goes around comes around.

beerguzzlingtemp said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
beerguzzlingtemp said...

Hi 6:10. I have to maintain my weight. If I skip meals, I get lightheaded and can't concentrate on my documents. My doctor said I am healthy as hell. He said whatever I am doing "keep on doing it."

Anonymous said...

This Michael Jackson thing is very telling.

A handful of document review temps dropped dead last year right in front of their coding stations. I would say the mortality rate of being a document review temp is 5x as high as being a cop.

Anonymous said...

I feel sorry for Michael Jackson, but in a sense this poor guy died a long time ago. The abuse, the surgeries, the child molestation stories - it was all a downward spiral.

Poor thing. His lawyer Brafman was on Larry King last night saying how Michael sobbed like a little child the first time the charges came up. He said Michael was very child-like, very frail, gentle, and a 12 year old.
Poor guy. May God Bless Michael Jackson. He was a damn good entertainer and I myself spent many night dancing [and coding] to Beat It, Thriller and Billie Jean.

Anonymous said...

What about Farrah Fawcett? Two icons in one day.

Even with her expensive, cutting edge treatment, she didn't make it. I guess it was her time.

Any contract attorney with her same condition wouldn't have lasted one tenth of the time.

Anonymous said...

9:37, Contract Attorneys wouldn't last long as you suggest. But, it doesn't make a difference. What quality of life does this field offer? And the alternative is...shitlaw at $35,000.

Anonymous said...

"Sometimes it does not pay to be nice and decent -- when in the ghetto play ghetto!!"

You'll teach yourself a bad work ethic and it will bite you in the ass. A lot of the BS that works in the temp world (jumping ship for a few dollars more, covering up screw ups instead of fixing them, snitching on other attorneys, etc.) will get your ass fired before you know what happens in the real world.

This is another minus of temping. You learn bad work habbits and are rewarded for them. This makes you a terrible employee when you find a real job.

Anonymous said...

"shitlaw at $35,000."

Network a little and you'll land something at 45-50 and then get a raise to 60 in 6 months or so. 40 hours a week type of job. This assumes you can do the work. Actual jobs require more responsablitity and thought then coding.

Anonymous said...

What the fuck is wrong with the people you already have registered? These agencies have no loyalty. DeNovo has almost the whole city registered and tons of reviewers are looking for projects.

Aren't they familar with the contract attorneys they have? More resume fishing.



Document Review Attorneys

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Reply to: deborah.morgan@denovolegal.com [Errors when replying to ads?]
Date: 2009-06-26, 5:27PM EDT



We are seeking admitted attorneys that have NOT yet registered with De Novo Legal.



MUST have previous document review experience. *Experience conducting privilege review and second request review is also desirable. You must be willing to work long hours and weekends.



*****At this time I can only reply to experienced and NEW reviewers to De Novo*****



Thank you!

Anonymous said...

A dark living room, shades half drawn.
Light from tv illuminates, dirty dishes mixed with garbage.

"go make me some money, ain't free i got to take of to care of you, get some money made for me" fuck yous and no fuck you are exchange, usual threat of violence, some grappling, a push. Word bitch is used, along with damn.

First post to correctly name the recruiter's household just depicted wins the prize of the day.

Anonymous said...

A dark living room, shades half drawn.
Light from tv illuminates, dirty dishes mixed with garbage.

"go make me some money, ain't free i got to take of to care of you, get some money made for me" fuck yous and no fuck you are exchange, usual threat of violence, some grappling, a push. Word bitch is used, along with damn.

First post to correctly name the recruiter's household just depicted wins the prize of the day.

Anonymous said...

"What the fuck is wrong with the people you already have registered?"

They want fresh meat. They don't want the same tired, self-entitled permatemps, they want a new crop of hungry, desperate easily slapped down "attorneys". With over 40,000+ graduates from ABA law schools churned out every year and a large chunk flooding the NYC market, coupled with the loss of jobs in the legal field, they can literally pick and choose.

Remember, they need to reach a politically correct balance, too. So if they have too many white guys left on the projects they will have to get fresh bodies of those embodying the desired racial, ethnic and gender characteristics to balance out the project.

But the bottom line is they can ask for new people, because they literally have an endless supply of hours hungry, desperate attorneys. You can thank the ABA, Sallie Mae and the law school cartel for this. The gutter scraping bottom feeders at De Novo are just taking advantage of favorable market conditions.

Besides, De Novo has always done this. They burn people out in their sweatshops, forcing them to work 10+ hour six or seven day work weeks, often at a flate rate.

It's a real sweatshop, with no flexibility and workers burn out fast.

Anonymous said...

At least De Novo will acknowledge your existence, unlike that bitch Sara Kim who after contacting you won't even return your call. It's called fucking manners and human decency.

Anonymous said...

8:57

They also want to help the schools push up their stats, so they can advertise at the schools.

As a result, they want to collect resumes from recent grads.

For what it's worth, the agencies are always trying to jerk everybody around. It's time to get out to the temp biz. Temping isn't what it used to be.

Anonymous said...

The law schools pay some of these agencies kickbacks so that they will pick up many of their recent grads in order to boost their placement stats.

Anonymous said...

Who cares if they acknowledge you? The only thing they have to do is find me work. I don't care if they indulge me in polite conversation or return every phone call. If they find me work and pay me on time, their job is done.

There are just so many people that think being a TTT law grad entitles them to something or some kind of respect. It doesn't.

You and the rest of us are just lemmings, modern white collar assembly line workers, nothing more.

Get over your entitlement issues and stop polluting these projects with your whiny crybaby attitude. You are just a joke, an idiot with $100k + debt from a lowbrow law school.

You should be grateful that any firm hires you, let alone "treats you with respect". This value system is for the birds, and is unworkable.

Get used to "doing more with less". Obama is going to obliterate the economy with this absurd "cap and trade" crap, so any manufacturing or even legal work will become massively more expensive and much more will be outsourced.

These are the battles we should be fighting, not absured bitching about accounting for your time.

Anonymous said...

Sarah Kim call me today and say "Fucky sucky."

Recruiter said...

1246, I agree with you. Unless it's about how to best serve our elite law firm clients, I don't want to hear about it.

Anonymous said...

Recruiter, you are a poorly conceived flame. Stop harassing the temps your idtiotic drivel.

You are a chimp and a retard, who cleary should find something better to do with his time.

The Yuppie Attorney said...

"Headhunters/Recruiters in general are dying breeds.

3:08 PM"

*****
I have to disagree with you. We thought that in the 1980s, "this was a dying trend in I.T.." It just got worse. They spread into Acctg and the legal field. They are now trying to get into entertainment, marketing, and health care. Yes, there are temp physician ads. Recruiters = cheap non-permanent labour.

Karl Marx "labour theory" -> "The producers discovered the can replace a man with a machine. Then the producers discovered they can replace the machine with a woman and three children." It's a battle for the lowest cost labour.

Anonymous said...

I am tired of the racial balancing quotas that exist on these projects. It's reverse racism at its worst. If you are white, the slightest infraction will put you on the wrong side of the formula. Meanwhile, the fat cows get away with murder and they know it.

Anonymous said...

Recruiter - How long is the rod stuck up your ass?

Anonymous said...

Back to the Labaton project: I have seen a dramatic change for the better in the way John B, the staff attorney, interacts with the temp attorneys since the complaint. It is very obvious to me that Labaton management scolded him. Before, he was surly, condescending and dictatorial toward the temps, but now he is respectful and even cordial. In the past, I guess he figured he was such a hotshot that he could manage whatever way he wanted because attorneys in this bad economy will put up with anything just to hold on to a project. This guy just got out of law school and has not any substantive experience in any field, but he is trying to come across as knowledgeable about litigation. He does not know what the fuck he is doing; however, some idiotic temps ask this know nothing whether a document is responsive or not. Maybe this swelled his head and gave him the idea that he was better than everybody else. Temp attorneys: Look at the fucking document, make a decision and then click next. End of story!
John B: my friends and I are watching you, and if you do not act in a decent and professional manner toward the temps, you will be exposed, and believe me you have seen nothing yet if you behave like an asshole again.
And the same goes for any other staff attorney on the project. This week we had one fill in for another who was on vacation. She freaked out because a temp spilled something in Merrill’s precious conference room. She was snappy the first day, but her disposition improved as the week went on. This was probably due to the fact that she knew John B. was being disparaged on this blog, and she did not want to be lambasted too.
The bottom line is that my friends and I have had it with being mistreated by staff attorneys and paralegal types who run these projects. We are hard working people who are not slackers, and if you treat us unfairly, we will expose you with Tom the Temp’s help on this blog.
Even though Labaton people have improved their attitude, Merrill Corp, our “host,” at this offsite location, still sucks. They watch us like hawks in order to detect some infraction of the rules, for example, checking your voicemail while waiting for the elevator in order to go to another floor to actually talk on your cell phone; you dare not answer a call on the floor that you work on and say hold on, let me go to another floor in order to talk to you. There is a Merrill guy who hangs around the front desk by the elevator and he just hopes to bust a temp. Of course, he has nothing better to do. I want to tell this dope to go fuck himself and wear a dress. The big assed secretary usually holds court at the front desk, and even though we can’t say a word in the hallway, she talks loudly about her personal business. This is a classy person to have as you get off the elevator and get your first impression of Merrill. Well, maybe it is appropriate to have her there, because Merrill is a sleazy, temp agency, with pretensions that they are some kind of wonderful corporation. They act like they are doing Labaton a favor for allowing temp attorneys to work in their lousy space. Labaton should grow some balls and make Merrill treat us decently; otherwise, Labaton should take their business elsewhere. I want to see more comments about Merrill on this blog.

Anonymous said...

In real life, recruiter looks like beerguzzlingtemp.

Recruiter said...

722, I have one word for you: Mumbai. Remember that your number one goal should always be how to best serve your elite law firm client. While I admit that Labaton is not so elite, they are still the client.

beerguzzlingtemp said...

11:56, Flattering recruiter girl will get you nowhere. She wishes she had my style. A lot of babes are after a piece of this action.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, fatso, eat your way to a heart attack!

And as for recruiter she needs a dick in her mouth.

Anonymous said...

My dick has been in recruiter's mouth many times.

Elite Law Firm Partner

Anonymous said...

Elite law firm partner:


You too? I was going to do the other end, but her cooter smelled just ghastly. Lord knows what may have died in there (perhaps Better Coder? We haven't heard from small dick wonder boy lately...)

Anonymous said...

Hey better how was the gay pride parade today,

You must be sore this weekend .

Try some prep H.

Anonymous said...

recruiter, can I sniff your fingers after you rub your pusssy

Anonymous said...

Merrill Corp bites the big one. I hate the bitch there.

Anonymous said...

Watch out for recruiter, "She's a man, baby!"

Anonymous said...

This week in law firm layoffs:

Harvard Law School: undisclosed

Dykema Gossett: 17 lawyers, 30 staff

Miller, Canfield, Paddock & Stone: 13 lawyers

DLA Piper: 9 lawyers, 13 staff

Total: 30 lawyers, 43 staff

Better Coder said...

Hey all,

A lot of you have contacted me over the weekend about this week's pay. Well, as requested, here's a snap sho up this week's take. Nothing's changed really. Pretty much the same numbers for the past two years.

M 12
T 12
W 12
R 12
F 12
S 8
S 8

Total 76

Gross $ 3,760.00
Net $ 2,556.80


Very Truly Yours,
Better Coder

Anonymous said...

Really? How can they do that when you don't even allow comments on your pitifully lame site?

Get back to the fry station, clown!

Anonymous said...

Better Coder,

Do you ever take vacations? How long? Where to?

Just curious...

Anonymous said...

After federal, state and local taxes as well as SDI, etc- there's no way better coder made what he claims to have made in Net. Just wanted to point that out.

Anonymous said...

http://www.nypost.com/seven/06282009/postopinion/opedcolumnists/dont_get_that_college_degree__176545.htm

COLLEGE DEGREE!
INTELLECTUALLY AND FINANCIALLY, STUDIES SHOW IT'S NOT WORTH IT
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more topics
UNITED STATED DEPARTMENT OF AGRICULTUREhide topics Comments: 19
Read CommentsLeave a CommentBy JACK HOUGH
Click to enlarge
Posted: 3:35 am
June 28, 2009

The four-year college degree has come to cost too much and prove too little. It's now a bad deal for the average student, family, employer, professor and taxpayer.

A student who secures a degree is increasingly unlikely to make up its cost, despite higher pay, and the employer who requires a degree puts faith in a system whose standards are slipping. Too many professors who are bound to degree teaching can't truly profess; they don't proclaim loudly the things they know but instead whisper them to a chosen few, whom they must then accommodate with inflated grades. Worst of all, bright citizens spend their lives not knowing the things they ought to know, because they've been granted liberal-arts degrees for something far short of a liberal-arts education.

I'm not arguing against higher learning but for it -- and against the degree system that stands in its way.

STARTING OUT BEHIND

Consider two childhood friends, Ernie and Bill. Hard workers with helpful families, each saves exactly $16,594 for college. Ernie doesn't get accepted to a school he likes. Instead, he starts work at 18 and invests his college savings in a mutual fund that tracks the broad stock market.

Throughout his life, he makes average yearly pay for a high school graduate with no college, starting at $15,901 after taxes and peaking at $32,538. Each month, he adds to his stock fund 5% of his after-tax income, close to the nation's current savings rate. It returns 8% a year, typical for stock investors.

Bill has a typical college experience. He gets into a public college and after two years transfers to a private one. He spends $49,286 on tuition and required fees, the average for such a track. I'm not counting room and board, since Bill must pay for his keep whether he goes to college or not. Bill gets average-size grants, adjusted for average probabilities of receiving them, and so pays $34,044 for college.

He leaves school with an average-size student loan and a good interest rate: $17,450 at 5%. The $16,594 he has saved for college, you see, is precisely enough to pay what his loans don't cover.

Bill will have higher pay than Ernie his whole life, starting at $23,505 after taxes and peaking at $56,808. Like Ernie, he sets aside 5%. At that rate, it will take him 12 years to pay off his loan. Debt-free at 34, he starts adding to the same index fund as Ernie, making bigger monthly contributions with his higher pay. But when the two reunite at 65 for a retirement party, Ernie will have grown his savings to nearly $1.3 million. Bill will have less than a third of that.

Anonymous said...

Better Coder is sooooo lame for working the weekend. It was beautiful outside. Obviously he is a depressed person, and no one wants to hang out with him so he sits inside and codes.
I feel sorry for you Better. You may be a Better Coder but you are a Worser Human Being.

Looney Bird!!!

Anonymous said...

Better can only get a date with his computer!

Anonymous said...

7:45 said: "Better can only get a date with his computer!"



Well, that and Rosie Palm.

Anonymous said...

12:51-You are a perfect example of what is probably wrong with a lot of people they have registered. Who wants to hire someone with anger issues? If they stopped recruiting, then I'm sure there would be another angry person on hear saying "De Novo won't even bring me in to register. What's wrong with them?" Can't win with you people.

Anonymous said...

Sorry, should be "here" not "hear"

Anonymous said...

1. Anger issues - ha, ha, agencies cause anger issues by fucking us over constantly
2. Shut the fuck up asshole -

Anonymous said...

Down with agencies

Agencies = pimps and pig-fuckers

Anonymous said...

Retards from agencies need not post...

Anonymous said...

Beginning to wonder if BC is credible after all...

He works 7 days a week, mostly 12 hour days, and never takes a vacation... at least he won't admit to taking one.

What kind of freakish automaton can pull that kind of schedule without a break?

It's like Steve Mahanahan's Child Clowns... "Our Child Clown's Never Take Breee-eeee-eeee-eeee-aaakkksss!

Anonymous said...

It's a geek tragedy.

While the city vows to save and create jobs for recession-ravaged New Yorkers, one of its biggest contractors is importing techies from India, instead of hiring local computer nerds.

IBM won a $1.9 million contract with the Department of Finance to analyze its old main databases so they can be improved, but the company has transported "consultants" from Mumbai and other parts of India to do most of the work.

At least 17 employees hired by an IBM subsidiary in India have worked in New York since October, inspecting the city's computer systems, which hold property and other tax records, insiders said.

"It was a dream come true," said Sunny Amin, 25, who traveled from his Mumbai home to the Big Apple -- his first US visit.

Amin, who has an engineering degree from a college in Aurangabad, landed his first job with IBM-India.

While a bit lost at first, Amin said, he rented an apartment in Parsippany, NJ, and commuted by bus. After nine months on Wall Street, he's being sent to another IBM job, in Minneapolis, on his three-year work visa.

Amin would not reveal his pay but did say, "I make about 10 times more than I would in India."

In contract documents, IBM says it pays its technical consultants at rates ranging from $26.24 to $278 an hour, not counting travel and living expenses.

It could not be learned whether IBM pays its Mumbai recruits the same rates, though watchdogs say US firms hire thousands of workers from India because they come cheap. IBM did not return calls.

But Amin's fortune means US citizens get shut out of well-paying jobs, critics charge.

"It's like a slap in the face," said Robert Ajaye, president of Local 2627, a union of city-employed computer specialists. "We have people in house who could do this job."

Instead, he said, some city staffers have had to "translate" for Indian techies lacking English skills.

Finance spokesman Sam Miller defended the contract.

"Our systems are so old that there are not many companies that have the ability to work on them. IBM does," he said.

Anonymous said...

http://jonathanturley.org/2007/11/26/law-students-sue-law-school-for-racketeering-and-fraud/

Anonymous said...

I, thee John Bungsolaphagus, Love the schicks of Better Coder and Recruiter. I like their photos too. The recruiter broad looks like that white cuban chick from NY Ch. 4 news. Better Coder looks like if Orel Hershiesher was a doc reviewer. Genuis schticks. I am a big fan.

Anonymous said...

To 9:34 PM

Yeah, anyone who questions the sleaziness of the big firms and agencies - including their changing the pay and terms of jobs mid-way through, but blacklisting you if you leave a job - has "anger issues".

Anonymous said...

hey fuck you today too

Anonymous said...

4:32: I don't think that's what we were talking about. We were talking about an agency posting an ad. How does someone get angry about something like that? It's pathetic.

Agencies always needs to recruit in order to offer the best pool of candidates to their clients and to be prepared when the market heats back up. There are tons of associates being laid off right now, so are the agencies not supposed to register them, and instead just place some psycho who gets angry when they see a job ad? Good plan.

Anonymous said...

Those of us who have temped know what we are talking about -- the rest of you assholes fuck the hell off!!

No one gives two hoots what you say.

Anonymous said...

I am not a BIG fan of Better Coder. But I tolerate him. As a suicidal temp attorney I need all the comedy I can get.

Also, I kind like Better's geeky clean-cut Buddy Holly picture. I also like Beer Guzzler. He is funny.

But I liked best stories about Big Mamma and Gaylard etc - even though I don't even know Gaylard and have just heard he's hot!!!

Maybe there is a reason to live if I can somehow secure a gig at S&C and see this fine gentleman for myself.

Anonymous said...

Gaylard is a weasel. No need to see him. He will make you sick.

Anonymous said...

Swing Justice Anthony Kennedy’s majority opinion is fairly narrow, yet broader and braver than my prediction that he’d merely send it back down for retrial on the facts.

Anonymous said...

In general, Kennedy says, you just can’t do what Mayor DeStefano did to Frank Ricci — yank the rug out from under him after he took the test because you didn’t like the racial results — at least not without a “strong-basis-in-evidence” that you’d lose a minority plaintiff’s disparate impact discrimination lawsuit. And if the facts resemble the facts in New Haven, Kennedy says, then this here Supreme Court says you won’t lose that lawsuit; so don’t throw Ricci’s test results out. Capisce? (Warning: This here Supreme Court likely to be replaced by a more Obama-friendly Supreme Court.)
As commenters on this site, have pointed out, the real question is why ‘t this modest and perfectly reasonable response to an egregious injustice was merely 5-4 rather than 9-0?
The Supreme Court ruled (my apologies for the semi-illegibility of the following — the Supreme Court doesn’t seem to know much about HTML yet):
All the evidence demonstrates that the City rejected the test results because the higher scoring candidates were white.Without some other justification, this express, race-based decision-making is prohibited. The question, therefore, is whether the pur-pose to avoid disparate-impact liability excuses what otherwise would be prohibited disparate-treatment discrimination. …
Thus, the Court adopts the strong-basis-in-evidence standard as a matter of statutory construction in order to resolve any conflict between Title VII’s disparate-treatment and disparate-impact provisions. Pp. 19–26.

Anonymous said...

Clap, clap.

Anonymous said...

Is the law school industry striking back against us by putting out a fake blog that rehabilitates the phrase "toilet law"?

See my latest blog entry:

http://lawschoolscam.blogspot.com/2009/06/law-school-industry-is-striking-back.html

Anonymous said...

The motley crew at Sullivan could learn a thing or two from Michael Jackson. Just like Jackson was surrounded by a bunch of enablers and sycophants his whole life allowing him to act inappropriately, the litigation clowns at Sullivans are also surrounded by a bunch of loser ass kissers who will do just about anything to keep those lousy jobs. The legal analysts couldn't hold down a professional position if their life depended upon it.

Anonymous said...

That is very true. These clowns will fall in time.
They are quite silly and stupid. Amazing that they are hired by a mega law firm. But who else would do paralegal work after a law degree. What they do is nothing different from what most paralegals do.

Even a numbskull paralegal can tell a priv doc.

Anonymous said...

Staff Attorneys = Pig Fuckers

Recruiters = Goat Fuckers

Better Coder = Lampost Fucker

Anonymous said...

7:31 PM

If by "toilet law" you mean working at a small firm, I assure you that it's not bad at all. The hours are good, the work interesting, and you have the possibility of career growth. Plus, the money isn't bad.

Temping leads nowhere, the agencies do their best to jerk you around, and the hours suck. I don't know about you, but I'd rather have a few hundered dollars less per month than be stuck in front of a computer on saturday coding some docs.

Anonymous said...

No working at a small firm is THE WORST.

Worse than temping by far.

Usually run by some screaming psycho with monthly turnover of the single associate and never have money to pay your peanuts salary.

Shit work, horrible conditions.

Anonymous said...

I just stumbled in after a night in and out of bc's loosened backhols

Anonymous said...

If you have these issues with
Labaton, you should go work elsewhere. If you decide to stay on the countrywide project i guess
no one else wants to hire you. I
think you should identify yourself
if you wanna talk such a big game.
Only a DOUCHE BAG goes on a blog
and talks shit without putting
a name behind it.

Anonymous said...

2:53

Spot on. Working for a small firm like the one you described is truly working in the gutter of the legal profession.

It is far worse than coding -- there's not even a fair comparison. Coding is an honest day's work for an honest day's pay.

Working for a shitlaw firm with 1-2 associates is low-end legal prostitution. These plaintiffs' firms usually concentrate on personal injury because the better firms snatch up all the good cases and clients in most markets.

You are constantly scrounging for cases, prostituting yourself, listening to deadbeat clients talk about their shitty car accidents and personal problems, dealing with nasty insurance companies and idiotic chiropractors, the dirt-poor immigrants and white trailer trash clients who think personal injury law is like some kind of government-sanctioned ATM for "victims" of "accidents".

You are so right about the monthly turnover, the screaming maniac bosses, the high pressure, the constant feeling of "tomorrow might be my last day because it's taking too long to settle that rear-ender from last month"...

This is the most marginal sewer of the legal profession (and actually amounts to about 75% of lawyers' work in this country, per some very real statistics I just saw), and should be avoided at ALL COSTS.

Some small firms in some markets are more upscale "boutiques" that specialize in things like real estate law, wills/trusts, etc., but those are RARE.

For the vast majority, small firms = shitlaw = personal injury.

Anonymous said...

Why don't you post your name then 8:16? Oh, we probably know it anyway. Hi, John!

Anonymous said...

It's not john. But i know your
name...... DOUCHE BAG. And why
should i publish my name? if you
don't have the balls to publish
your name? After all im only
replying to your low class
bullshit.

Anonymous said...

I think all work sucks. Big or small firms, you get sodomized in the end. I wish I could find a rich person to marry---sigh

Anonymous said...

Hi, Joan King!

Love your new toilet law website.

Anonymous said...

All the things that original original poster described is, I am sad to report, painfully correct. But I must admit that the things didn't improve. Yes it is true that we no longer have to sign in and out with the staff attorney. But John B's rude and unprofessional attitude didn't improve at all. Today he announced that "he received a complaint about a temp attorney who left the break room with some wrappers behind." He threatened everyone that he himself better not catch anyone doing something like that because if he did, that he will expose that person to everyone.

P.S. if anyone is interested, google his name you might find some very interesting/funny stuff. For one thing, he sees himself as "Style Icon" lol. At Labotan, we call him "Bart" or I heard some female colleagues call him "Creep"

Anonymous said...

john b. need to quiet down...he chats and giggles way too much with the other staff atty about non-work related matters...not suitable work environment for the others exposed to this nonsense

Anonymous said...

to john b.s credit he did profess that merrill people couldnt tell if it was the fed ex guy or a coder who threw a wrapper or was he referring to the feces in the urinal story -- lol

Anonymous said...

6:05pm
I have to respectfully disagree with you in regard to John B's attitude and the candy wrapper incident. Tom, the dickhead from Merrill, forced him to speak to us about the dropped wrapper in the lunchroom. In the past, John B would have yelled at us, but this time he was passing along information in as nice a way as possible, at least to my group. He is doing his best to be cordial since the complaint was made against him. I don't care how phoney it is, but he behaves in a professional manner now.
The Merrill guy has nothing better to do than complain about a wrapper and he needs to be taken care of. I don't care about Merrill's stinking lunchroom and I would love to thrash it. Why is Labaton deferring so much to a lousy agency like Merrill. Any ideas on what we can do to this Tom guy?

Anonymous said...

I have an idea. Why don't you
clean up after yourselves you fuckin' pigs. You should be happy
Labaton provides a place for you
people to eat. Juding by the way
the countywide coders behave
at Labaton's main office you
people should eat your food
out doors and not be allowed
into the firm's lunchroom.

Anonymous said...

Anyone know what happened to the two women who sat in Lindsay's room?

Anonymous said...

Ask Linday dum ass

Anonymous said...

Good idea. And maybe after I'll braid her hair and tuck her in for a bedtime story.

Anonymous said...

Hi John B!
Hi LOBOTOMY!

(Has John B. had his partial lobotomy finished yet?)

Anonymous said...

Dear Anonymous who posted the recruiter pay posting:
i am a recruiter here in NYC. (Shana Pederson... no need to hide my name) PLEASE do share; which agency pays like that; because we all want to go work there. The average for most of us in temp is around
50K- 100K or in the case of 2009 -50k or whatever our draw is...
love your friendly neighborhood recruiter.

Anonymous said...

For the above poster who said John B acted professionally... umm if you think that his behavior relating the story is professional, you must have been mistreated to a serious degree in the past. I do understand that Merrill is giving him a hard time but you definitely don't come around saying how he is going to expose that person to everyone etc. That's truly unprofessional. I was so embarrassed listening to that. Also you can tell that he was very upset and was barely suppressing it.

Petitnoir said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

john b, the female staff atty and merrill all suck...

merrill should be thrilled that the project involves their product lextranet and should bend over backwards to accommodate labaton employees such as the coders

Dave Moss said...

"Aw, fuck you! Fuck the lot of you! Fuck you all!"

Anonymous said...

John B. is a psycho case.

Time to check this Nut job into the nearest loony bin.

Anonymous said...

Hit the road Jack and don't you come back no more, no more, no more, no more. Hit the road Jack and don't you come back no more.
Today, John B. was banished from Varick Street and sent packing with his tail between his legs back to Labaton.
Behold the power of the blog!
Thank you Tom the Temp!

Anonymous said...

that is frigging awesome...thanks for making my year :)

Anonymous said...

Yes John B was called back because a few people complained to Labaton, just like the original poster who emailed. If you are being mistreated, speak up!

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